Our New Life

Chapter 4

y/n woke up with a gasp, her throat dry, head pounding, memories of her past inside her head making an ache in her heart. After taking deep breaths she looked around, her vision was blurry. 

She heard someone entering the room making her look at the figure. She focused to look at the face, it was Damon, looking at her with worried eyes.

"I thought I lost you," he said sitting on the bed with her. And with that new memories came rushing inside her head, some she knew, some she didn't.

~

"Tell me what's wrong," he said with dilated pupils and she spilled her whole life in front of him.

~

"You are okay, you miss him but you won't cry for him, you will focus on your career. You would live your life because that's what he wanted," he said and she repeated, and she repeated those words against her will. But after that, she felt satisfied, she felt relieved. And then smiled at him.

~

"y/n, don't ask me anything. I'll disappear sometimes but you won't ask me anything. You won't bring that again, you won't worry about me. I would be fine no matter where I go." he said and she nodded, against her will but she nodded. And after that, she never asked him, where did he go, again.

~

She remembered those moments that she had no clue about, she remembered Damon hypnotizing her. She remembered doing those things which she didn't want to but did because of Damon. 

She remembered laughing with him, him comforting her, she remembered making her pain go away by compelling her. Remembered him laughing with her, watching shitty movies with her. 

Pain in her head was increasing, making her whimper, she put her head in her hands. Damon put his hand on her shoulder in worry "hey, are you okay?" 

A new memory came, him feeding on a woman's blood, his face covered in blood. His fangs showed out of his mouth, making her remember his friend's true identity.

She pushed his hand away, not wanting any comforting touch for him. The happy memories she had once, had faded away. Now she only remembers him as the monster she saw before passing out, making her realize she was hit by a truck. 

"I was hit by a truck, how am I here? What happened," she whispered to herself panicking. "I brought you here, you hit pretty bad...." he said, giving her a glass of water. "Drink this, you'll feel better." in any other circumstances she would have thrown that glass on his face but right now she didn't have the power to do anything so pissing off a vampire was out of the question. 

She took the glass from his hands and drank the water, making herself feel more thirsty. "More!" she asked for more in a hoarse voice. He knew her thirst wasn't for water but gave her it anyway.

After a few minutes, he tried to talk to her "y/n I want to tell you something." "what? That you are a monster, a vampire, surprise I know already Damon. I saw you sucking her blood." "then I got hit by a truck and," she said exasperated. She was overwhelmed by her emotions. She was feeling everything, pain, sadness, anger. 

"Hey I know you are feeling overwhelmed but please listen to me. I have never done it before, I've never cared about anything or anyone, what people think about me. But you y/n, I care, I do care what you think, you are my best friend, in a long while. Please just let me explain." he tried to calm her down and told her his story when she relaxed a little bit. It was his turn to spill his story in front of her. 

"I wasn't always like this, I had a family. A mom, strict dad that would beat the shit outta me. Had a sweet loving baby brother, I would always protect him from our father." he chuckled bitterly. "I was born in 1839, my human life wasn't lovey-dovey. I lived a tough life. In my younger days, I was considered irresponsible, cowardly, and a dumbass little shit, by my father. But after my mother's death, I knew I had to stand up for my brother. I joined the army in 1861, didn't want to but did, because of my father. No matter how hard I tried to stand up for myself, I couldn't. The little kid inside me that used to be afraid of his father didn't go.

But everything changed after I met her, my whole life changed. She was the woman I loved. She gave me some weird kind of comfort, I wasn't scared of anything, not my father, nothing. Of course, she was compelling me but as a human, I couldn't understand that. But she loved both my brother and me. She was with both of us." that made y/n cringe and he could see that on her face but didn't say anything. 

"She would feed us both our blood, feed on us and we would say a thing to her. My father was a member of the town council and a vampire hater. He didn't know about Katherine and what she was doing with her. When Stefen found out first about Katherine he wanted to tell father but of course, Katherine handled that. But our father, that bastard was too smart. He started to give him vervain and then he couldn't be compelled by Katherine anymore. And then, when my father asked him about her he spilled everything and that's what made my father hate us more. 

She was taken by the town's people to burn her with other vampires. I was mad at Stefan, so he promised me to keep her safe. We went to the church where they kept her but then our father shot us both. He killed us, his own sons because his hate was greater than his love for his sons." she saw tears in his eyes, she'd never seen Damon's vulnerable side in those five years.

"Her blood was in our system, so when we died we became vampires. Technically we didn't, we still had to feed on someone's blood to complete the process. Stefen woke up before me, his hunger got to him, and completed the transition by feeding on our father. When I woke up I didn't know what he did. I didn't want to become a vampire. Every single thing Katherine did in front of us was coming back to my mind. I felt betrayed, I felt hurt, the woman I loved used me. I decided to die rather than being a vampire. 

But then Stefen came, forcing me to complete the transition by feeding on a woman. I was so hungry, I just couldn't control myself at the sight of blood. And then I fed on her, killed her. My brother, whom I loved so much, protected him from an abusive father, he forced a life I didn't want on me. He made me a monster. From that day, I decided to be carefree. I didn't give a damn how many people I killed. I was a monster that's what my life was.

But deep down, I knew how much I care about my brother, I still do but every time I see his face, I remember what he did to me. I know how it feels to be betrayed y/n, you can't imagine how much I felt embarrassed, how much I wanted to tell you but I knew, you would leave me the second you knew what I am. And see that's what happened, you left. You didn't even let me explain. You were leaving without letting me tell you how much I care about you, how much I admire our friendship that I had to be selfish to not tell you about me. When you..." he was saying everything like he was letting all of his feelings, his anger, his insecurities out. Like he was trying to free himself from the pain inside him. "When you, what Damon?" she asked him, seeing his hesitancy

He took a breath "when you hit that truck, you died y/n.." she got frozen by his words. She knew the accident was pretty bad and she could have died, how could she be alive. She didn't feed on Damon. It was like Damon read her thoughts "when I saw you there lying in your blood, I quickly went to you and fed you my blood. It was a risk, I didn't know how much of life you had left if you were even alive. But I did anyway. I brought you home, I didn't want to lose you y/n. I don't know if I'm that much of a friend to you but you, you are my best friend I never had. You are the friend that everyone wants in their lives.

You made me better than before. I don't know..." "I can't be a vampire Damon." she cut him off without looking at him. "The life I was living. I knew it would end. I couldn't move on from him, it's like I was waiting for my death to be with him." "and now you are trying to give me eternal life. For what? I would do, of this life huh?" he knew that was coming, he knew y/n wouldn't ever want to live this life. Hell, even he didn't want to. 

"Then I won't force you, I understand. For the last few years, I've been working to find a way to bring Katherine out of the tomb. I don't know how much chance there is but there is still hope.

I know you think you have no one to live for but just to let you know, I'm here for you. If you just want to give your life away because you think you don't have anyone, then you have. But still, I won't force a life you don't want to live, on you." a tear left his eye. He got up and turned around and left her with her thoughts...