Fallen

Chapter Forty One

Blaine

I sat silently on the sink counter at home, stiffly swinging my sore legs back and forth as I watched Jason run water over a flannel. My body hurt with each breath I took. After the adrenaline of tonight had washed away, all I wanted to do was swallow some painkillers and sleep forever.

The unbearable silence in the room was uncomfortable and hung heavy in the air. I sneaked a glance to Jason. He was watching the water drench the towel, but I could tell his mind was elsewhere.

"Hey," I mumbled.

He ignored me. I put a hand on his shoulder, but he shrugged off my touch and moved away.

"I'm sorry, man."

He scoffed and squeezed the wet flannel tight in his fist. "No, you're not."

My chin was grabbed and suddenly he was dabbing at my cup lip. I winced, but he ignored me. Unfortunately, he was right. Despite everything that had happened tonight, I didn't regret it. To see Anna again after so long made the consequences of tonight worth it.

I hissed with pain from the heavy pressure on my mouth.

"Stop fussing," he grumbled.

I complied because it was the least that I could do. I hadn't meant to drag Jason into the events of tonight. We could have both gotten seriously hurt. I knew I was lucky to still be alive.

Jason was avoiding my gaze, however much I tried to get him to look at me. He tightened his grip on my chin and tilted my head up to wipe away the blood coming from my nose.

"Hey," I croaked, reaching up to grasp his wrist and pull the towel away from me. "I really am sorry I got you involved tonight."

Jason finally looked at me. I knew exactly how he was feeling: hurt and pissed off. He had never been one to hide his feelings from his face. The tears in his eyes made me want to run to the ends of the Earth just to make him feel better. He didn't deserve this, any of this. I hesitantly reached out to comfort the man I'd known all of my life. He'd done so much for me all these years, getting me out of trouble, holding me when I was sad. He certainly saved my life more than once. I owed him deeply.

As I touched his shoulder, he threw the wet towel into the sink and rested his hands down on the counter to support his tired body.

"You said you'd leave Anna alone," he said. "You finished with her because she's not safe around us."

"I know that, Jase. I didn't think I could look after her properly, but all its done is put her in more danger."

Jason shook his head and paced away from me. "You know what happened to Maria. I can't believe you'd put Anna in the same position."

I slipped off of the counter with a grunt. "I don't want to live the rest of my life without loving anyone in case they get hurt. Is that a life you want to lead?"

"Of course it's not, but I do it to protect myself and you boys."

"Jason..."

"I don't know how you do it, Blaine. You just block out everything that's happened to us. We have lost so many people. I just thought you cared about Anna too much for her to be next."

"I do care for her, and I can protect her. We all can."

Jason spun around. "Really? Well, we've done a fucking awful job of looking after people so far. Kieran's been gone almost six years, but you've clearly forgotten about him."