Accessory Wars

Chapter 55-Ki

            What the actual fuck?! I stood there flabbergasted for a good three minutes as Harvey's form grew smaller. Then it vanished outside the main doors. Did he just walk out? Did he just abandon his girlfriend? I tried to think of the situation from his point of view but I found it impossible to believe anything but the worst. Even more so when I compared it to how he acted around Jay and myself. My nails dug into the beds of my palms, my shoulders taught with rage.

Bastard. Coward.

I tried to convince myself he was in shock. Heck, I was shocked by the announcement! Maybe he needed some air. Yeah, a few minutes to walk around outside to clear his head. Then he'd come back to help Felisa get back on his feet.

And then I'd turn into a fairy and turn the floor into a field of flowers.

Harvey wasn't coming back. He was never coming back. He didn't even have the guts to say goodbye to Felisa's face! I wanted to tear someone's head off. I let out a strangled growl in my throat as I stormed back towards the bathroom. Screw him! Felisa didn't need a friend like him. My anger began to die out with each step, morphing into a ball of emptiness as I stopped in the hall outside the bathroom. What would I tell Felisa? Should I lie and say he stepped out? Should I try to soften the blow? Should I tell her upright?

"He's not coming, is he?" I looked up, finding Kami standing before me. I was so wrapped up in my head I failed to notice her approach. I shook my head, feeling angry and numb. "Where is he?"

"He left," I said, my throat feeling far too dry. The silence that followed could have killed someone. Harvey was definitely getting a doll made after him and, given the chance, I'd stick a pin in it myself. Kami's hands curled up into fists and her jaw tightened. "Kami..."

"If I see him again, I'll shoot him in the head," she seethed.

"Please don't commit murder," I requested. Kami crossed her arms over her chest, muttering some choice words. I let out a strangled exhale and forced myself to move back to the bathroom. Kami followed a step behind.

As we entered, the bathroom no longer echoed the sounds of tears. Instead, it was silent. Eerily so. Jay remained at his spot holding Felisa's hand in his while Felisa stared at the stall wall with a blank expression. It was like she turned into a doll. Emotionless. Lifeless. Accepting the terrible fate that befell her. It made me feel sick.

"You didn't find him," she murmured. It wasn't a question. She already knew.

"He left," I said. She didn't even flinch. "He didn't say why either but I can make a good assumption."

"I figured he would." Her voice sounded deeper than usual, no doubt from her not focusing on pitching her voice higher. As I stared at her face, I could see her past form in my mind's eye. The form she wanted no one to see. I scribbled out the image in my mind with an imaginary red marker. Felisa took a steadying breath and wiped her face again.

"I'm sorry," I blurted out, unsure what else to say.

"It's fine," she replied. She pulled her hand free from Jay and wrapped her arms around her knees, resting her chin on top of the stack. "I'm used to people turning away from me. I'm disgusting, after all. Nothing more than trash in the ocean."

"That's not true," Jay protested before Kami or I could.

Felisa's gaze slid over to him. "You can honestly say you're not put off by me?"

Jay sat back on his heels. "I won't lie. I do think it's weird," he admitted. His hands folded in his lap. "I grew up in a home where such a notion would condemn you to eternity in Hell but I'm learning to open my eyes and my heart. I can't change how I was brought up but I can choose to make my own decisions on how I view the world. When I look at you, I don't see a piece of trash. I don't see some creature of Hell trying to poison me. I see a person who's struggling like I am. Being...being transgender is a part of who you are. It is who you are." His face tinted with pink and he lowered his gaze to his hands. "Just like being gay is who I am. I know I struggle with myself and I continue to struggle with comprehending everything within the spectrum, but I'm trying. If I start seeing or treating you differently because of learning who you are, then you don't deserve me as a friend."