Be My Addiction

12 • Message From Family

Ethan

Turns out, the presentation went incredibly well. During the class, we managed to get everyone excited and into the game. Mr. Grenell even let us move some of the desks so it could be a real competition for the presentation. Despite the judgmental looks, everyone left the classrooms with grins and candy in their pockets. Even the people who didn’t join.

Eugene may or may not have passed the candy around to everyone.

We both headed off to our next classes in high spirits and by the end of the day, I approached Eugene at his locker. “Hey, Gene” I grinned.

He smiled at the nickname and turned to face me, “What’s up” some of his strawberry blonde hair fell into his eyes and I tried so hard to keep my hand from brushing the strands away.

Shrugging, I fought the heat that crept into my cheeks “I was uh... Just wondering if you wanted to hang out today?”

Soon a slight frown worked onto his lips, “I don’t think I can today. I have to do some football practice before taking Veronica out.”

I felt my heart drop a little but I knew he was busy. Nodding, I smiled and he gently returned one of his own “Tell me how it goes then?” He nodded. I gave a - slightly awkward - wave, before leaving to walk home. I may have survived sitting in the car with Eugene but that didn’t mean I was comfortable asking for a ride from anyone, let alone driving, yet.

I got home a few minutes later and decided it was better for me to be out than stuck in my room again. I called the pet shelter and asked if they could use an extra hand. The shelter wasn’t too busy but they always enjoyed volunteers who enjoyed being with animals, even with the dirty work. I changed into a cooler outfit, knowing I would probably be working, in the sun, with the dogs, before walking to the shelter.

I ended up working for a few hours before going home. Today was a bit boring, besides biology. I only realized, now, how our project didn't have much of a relation to biology. I wasn't worried though because Mr. Grenell didn't specify what genre the project had to be done in. He probably was just testing us to see how much effort we would put into a project for something we generally knew about.

I decided to take a shower. I went to my room and kicked off my shoes, before heading to the bathroom. I stripped and turned my attention to my mirror. I'm not someone who admires themselves, but I did take notice that I didn't have a scowl on my face, like I usually do. Instead, I had a rather neutral expression that had hints of happiness. Of course my eyes were still the gray-blue from the high I was always stuck in.

Turning my attention from the mirror, I turned the water to warm and waited until the water was hot enough before slipping in.

The shower was short-lived but I enjoyed every bit of it. It's different for everyone, but I find it easier to not focus when there was almost scalding water running all over me. Or maybe I was just taking too hot of showers. When I got out and dressed, I checked my phone to see two messages.

One from Mom, and one from Dad.

Mom: Ethan, your father and I will be staying late at the office but we should be home around midnight.

Of course.. what else would I expect. Surely, it was unreasonable to think that maybe they would be home at a decent time tonight. Not responding, I left the chat and looked at the message from Dad.

Dad: We won't be home until late tonight.

Sighing, I glanced out the window before building up the courage to confront him.

Me: You're never home.

That was such a simple statement but it meant a lot. They were never here. They barely talk to me. They don't want to ask me how my day has been. They don't try to make it so we can have a family dinner. They don't say cheesy little things to embarrass me.

They don't tell me they love me.

Why haven't they said it yet?

Did they stop loving me when Brian died?

I could feel the rising emotion building in my chest and my throat began to throb. I ignored the tears that wanted to fall and swallow me whole.

Dad was typing.

Dad: I know

Dad: You know how busy your mother and I have been lately. There are new people we have to train and lots of paper to work through.

Dad: You work, you know how it is. We don't have a lot of free time.

Biting my lip roughly, I typed out the one sentence I have been trying to hold back for weeks.

Me: You made time when Brian was alive

Hitting send, I shut off my phone and dropped onto the bed. Pulling the pillow over my face, I let out a muffled sigh, closing my eyes. I didn't expect my father to text back. It was the type of sentence that would shock someone into silence.