LOVE OR HOPE?

Chapter Five.

The door was opened and I met my mum on the couch with several bottles sprawled on the floor.

It was a Tuesday and she was supposed to be working during the day. Besides,my mum never drinks. I tried to ignore her and walk right into my room but she called my name,dragging it lazily like she was calling for help.

Her dark and curly hair was messy and flying out at different corners of her head. She looked like the aftermath of a huge fight with a trained wrestler. Her eyes were puffy and pale,she looked so sick and pitiful.

I turned my back to face her and hung my backpack on one of the dining chairs.

"I miss your father." My mother said quietly,tears were beginning to form in her eyes,I was speechless. She hardly ever talks about my father and I didn't know the best way to reply to her,but God knows that I think about that man everyday and what my life would have rather been like if I grew up with him even if I hardly ever knew him.

"He was my first love and he shouldn't have died like that!" She screamed in anger,crying profusely now as she opened up another bottle. First love?,This sounded so clichè not just because it was coming from my mother but I've just never experienced it,You might be thinking that my thing with Brian should count but it doesn't,I just admired Brian because I found him really cute,but not enough to get any feelings attached. I've never loved anyone except if what I felt at four for my Dad is love.

"He left me in this world to live in pain and misery. Is he fair?" She slurped,facing me.

I shook my head.

"Bastard!" She screamed again. "I curse you wherever you are!!" She added.

Mum and Dad were married for just ten years before he died,She must have loved him dearly since she got married to him at a young age and could never have been expecting him to die so soon.

Mum never opens up to me and this is one of the longest conversations we've ever had so far. I don't even know how to relate to her,since the only thing we ever relate to is sorrow and pain which occurs when she is being badly beaten by step dad.

"But I love Joseph too. God Knows I love him with all my heart,He is just no longer the man I married." She put her bottle down and sobbed into her hands as she covered her face.

My dad died when my mum was just thirty years old. She found it difficult to keep up with our education,she couldn't pay the fees and even food became so hard to come by,She was so ripped and couldn't afford to buy anything.

It was the night she went into the bar I hate so much that she met my step dad,She was waiting for the bar manager to give her details of her job as she had earlier gotten the job of a waitress before my step dad came closer to her for a "talk" and they soon fell in love. It was just a year that my dad had died that my mother got married to my step dad, My mother needed money and when he promised to help us financially,she didn't think twice about him.

Until he started showing his true colours after two years,he starting coming home only during the weekends and suddenly just on Sundays heavily drunk and ready to kill yet my mother has been keeping quiet all these while because of the huge amount of money he brings home. None of us knew his job nor why he only came home on weekends and I don't think anyone is planning to ask him anything at any moment from now. This was all that ever happened in this house. Fear and hope for a change that we know won't happen.

I was about to talk for the first time when there was a knock on the door.

"I'm going to get that" I said to her calmly and she only nodded.

I opened the door to reveal four strange people that I've never met before.

"Hello dear" The woman said,smiling so wide. They were black too. She was holding a tray full of cupcakes with her husband and two sons behind her.

"Hi." I replied coolly.

"We are your new neighbors. You must have heard us moving in." She said, smiling wider her little cute boy came closer to hold her hand while blinking his eyes repeatedly at me.

Truthfully,I didn't and looking across at my mother who has taken up her bottle and stated drinking again. I figured that she didn't notice as well.

"Yes. Welcome" I forced a smile. I stared at the disinterested older son who was also staring at me sternly as if he was trying to read what was going on in mind. He was tall and built,his hair was curly and dyed green,he also had green contact lens on, I tore my gaze away from him.

"Here,sweetie. These are for you." She gave me the tray filled with different flavours of cupcake. "I'm Maurice Bob,here's my husband, Stewart-" She pointed to the large and tall man who looked like an intimidating figure,He smiled and waved at me. "This is my cute and little favourite fruit,Ted. He's five years old." She said as she carried him into her arms, tickling him and causing him to giggle wildly. "And my nephew,Harold-" She pointed to her left side at Harold who was wearing a plain white shirt and a red sweatpants,I could have sworn that she was half expecting him to smile and wave too but he just dipped his hands into his pockets and looked sideways.

"He's just in one of his moods today. You know? Boys right?" She whispered to me and chuckled childishly,She was beautiful with her deeply etched dimples at both cheeks.

I forced a smile again.

"What's your name?" Ted asked, blinking cutely at me again. He's going to be a smart kid.

"Alyssa." I murmured.

"Where's Mum? Dad? Got any siblings? We would like to say hi." She continued.

"They are not home. I would extend your-" I was about to complete my words before my mum leaped and stumbled behind me,She got up and I saw her with her bag and her car keys.

Our new neighbors looked shocked at the state of my mum,She lazily smiled and tried to maintain her balance.

"Off to work." She said,waving at our neighbors and walked off.Mrs Maurice tried to wave back too with a facial expression that I can't even define.

"Would she be able to drive with her condition?" A concerned Maurice asked.

"Sure" I shrugged.

"We'll be seeing you soon." She finally said as she walked away with her family.

I was about to close the door with a sigh of relief and regret when Harold looked back and stared at me with those eyes that I couldn't make a meaning out of.

I slammed the door.

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Lots of love from Gifty.💃