ON HIATUS!!
|HIGHEST RANKINGS|
#1 REVIEWS
#1 CRITICISM
#1 FEEDBACK
-25|04|20
☆☆☆☆☆
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I have read all eight parts and focused on the grammar, like you asked me to do. I hope it helps you with your book and your future plans for other books (current books, too).
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Title:
The title is unique, yet it is very long and too broad of a title. I recommend for you to shorten it.
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Blurb:
There is no blurb for me to discuss. I cannot connect the cover with the blurb. I recommend for you to write a blurb.
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Grammar (focus):
Your plot holds a promising future, yet your execution is clumsy. Do the following below to fix it.There is nothing separating your authors notes from the book, so it doesnt make sense at all. When writing author's notes at the beginning and/or the end of the chapter, try putting the '--' as a separation between the two. When reading the rest of your book, I noticed that you do not use speech quotes when your characters are talking. When writing dialogue it is neccessary to use some sort of speech text.
Like this: (found in chapter 1 of your book) Maurice sighed, "I can see that he obviously didn't listen to the warnings you gave him."
Some other issues you struggle with is punctuation and capitalization of words. You rarely used punctuation such as periods and question marks. I recommend you to figure out where the sentences ends and begins. Then capitalize every word at a beginning of a sentence and dialogue. Make sure you are using proper tenses too, if its past tense use: was, were, couldve, shouldve, has, and had. If it is present tense use: have, is, are, could, and should. If it is future tense use: will, will be, etc. Check google and I recommend using grammarly to help you with your grammatical errors.
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Advice:
Show the readers by describing instead of telling them about it. Work on the structure of your book. Make a blurb. Focus a lot on the grammar.
----- Overall Enjoyment:
Okay, so I read the whole book, thinking it would have hooked me somewhere, so we could use that somewhere. The flow of the story wasn’t smooth and hooking, as described above. I had a hard time following the plot as I described before. I wasn’t able to properly get into the story because of what I mentioned above in the grammar section. Though I don’t want to completely set it aside, I just believe it needs some more work. I don’t think I would read past the first chapter if I saw the story in the passing book throughout Wattpad.
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