The Bubble Reviews 2.0 (ON HIATUS)

Sky_is_limit review: From the Perspective of a Player

Author: plainly_leemah

Hi. So, you wanted me to focus on plot development and character development. Of course, I always mention other things too!

Title/Cover/Blurb: Your title is pretty unique in my opinion. With a quick search on Wattpad, I didn't find any stories with the same title. It also matches the story perfectly.

Your cover is okay. It's very simple, but there's nothing wrong with the. For me, I don't think it's enough to push me to pick it up. One critique I have is the black bar at the bottom. It kind of clashes with the rest of the cover.

Your blurb isn't really a blurb at all. There are a few sentences then an excerpt. Personally, excerpts don't push me to read the story because I still have no idea what the story is about. I think it could use a lot of work.

Grammar: Some sentences could use some editing. The structure needs a bit of work along with cutting out a lot of fragments that I saw. But for the most part, some sentences were overly long and could have been split up.

Sometimes the story switches from third to first person. The dialogue could use some work as there will be no punctuation at all or the incorrect punctuation. Be sure to look out for that.

Finally, I think there may be some formatting issues. At one point, the MC was dreaming and the italics seemed to get a little bit messed up. And sometimes there are words that are capitalized when they shouldn't be.

Plot Development: The prologue is a little not needed in my opinion. It just seems like it should be chapter one because it's in the same timeline as the actual story. Usually, prologues take place before or after the main story. That's something to keep in mind.

So far, I think the pace is fine. Of course, I do need to read more to get a proper feel, but it just seems like a slow burn in which case is good. My only concern is the flow. Things get a bit awkward and sometimes it affects the readability negatively.

Character Development: In chapter two, the MC's friends were all given backstories and their personalities were explained. To me, that's too abrupt and I feel it hurts the flow. Over time, it would have been amazing to find that out. Especially through MC's thoughts.

I feel the same with MC. His reasoning for being a player/not player was kind of abrupt. Everything was dropped as an info dump and I feel like we learned about him way too earlier.

So, I feel like the character development can slow down a lot.

Overall Enjoyment: At the moment, I don't think it's my cup of tea. These types of stories are right up my alley and I do find them unique. What ruins it for me is the flow and character development.

Advice: Work on the flow of the plot and try to slow down on the characters. We should learn backstories and personalities over time and not all at once.