I Got Breastfed Again

003 Dairy

I knew this day was coming.

I was terrified by the mere thoughts of this day.

Mom had to go to her office. She wanted to extend her leave. So I was left with my dad and sister.

Just those two idiots.

"Why is he looking at us like that?" Dad asked Anu.

"I think he wants to drink." My sister said as she tried to lift her top.

"Nope." Fortunately, my dad stopped her.

She is only four or five. A chubby stupid elder sister.

A few days ago, she wanted to feed me. I don't know how she got that idea. But she started trying to breastfeed me. My good for nothing mom just laughed and didn't stop her. She even took out her mobile phone and tried to record it.

I struggled with all my might. But she wouldn't let go. With no other option, I did what I could.

I pooped.

That ruined their fun and they had to let me go.

But today, I don't have that choice. Of all days, I don't want to poop today.

I have absolutely no idea what my dad would do if I poop.

He got the feeding bottle and stuffed it in my mouth.

I wasn't hungry. I was just judging them.

This life is actually fun. You do nothing other than pooping and drinking all day and you judge everyone else. The perfect life.

But my dumb father mistook it and thought I was hungry.

"Why are you not drinking? It's your mother's milk." Dad said

I tasted it a bit. He wasn't lying. It was indeed her milk.

"Really? Then who milked her?" My sister asked.

"kugh.. cough..." I almost choked on the milk.

"Ha hahaha..." dad laughed.

Anu looked at him in confusion.

"She did it herself." He replied to Anu with a stupid smile.

I don't want to know. I shut my mind and decided not to think anything.

Sometimes, getting a second chance in life is awesome. But sometimes, it is torture. From morning to evening it is a series of embarrassing events.

"That's great. We can sell the extra to the restaurant." Anu happily said.

"..."

Dad froze for an instant. Then he roared in laughter.

Even I laughed.

Fortunately, I wasn't drinking. If I were drinking at that moment, I would have choked on the milk.

Anu also laughed confusedly. She had no idea why we were laughing. But she just laughed so that she wouldn't stand out.

I love my stupid sister.

I decided not to drink much from the bottle. There were two reasons. The first one was that it lacked the feeling. As for the second reason, I didn't want to poop when mom was not around.

Without mom, my house is a circus.

A bunch of clowns doing stupid stuff and hurting themselves. The only thing that lacks is an audience.

Do you have any idea how difficult it is to be the only mature person in the house?

And all I can do is watch them. I am a baby and I cannot tell them what to do.

Mom was gone for just ten minutes and dad and sister were discussing how to sell mom's milk to the restaurant. Dad was fighting hard to stop himself from laughing. Anu didn't notice it. She was busy counting the profit and making plans for spending that money.

I cannot say that I hated it. It would be really fun when Anu presents the idea to mom. I am sure that dad is also thinking of the same. He would surely get a load of scolding from mom. Then he would apologize with a stupid smile.

"A cow has only one breast. Mom has two. So we can get a lot of milk." Anu made a very important observation.

Dad exploded into another laugh. I also laughed.

She was comparing mom to a cow!

Kids have the attention span of a monkey. So in no time, Anu lost her interest in the dairy business and she went to play games on dad's computer. Dad also joined her.

I was a bit relieved to see that. It was far better than those two idiots getting into trouble.

Fortunately, mom returned within an hour

She had already talked on the phone and all she had to do now was submitting the letter. It was finished in no time and she returned.

"Mom... I have a super - awesome idea." Anu ran to mom excitedly.

"What is it, girl?" She asked as she kissed her. Then she grabbed Anu's hand and walked towards me to check on me.

"I will milk you and sell it to the tea shop. We can make lots of money."

"Huh?" For a moment, mom thought that she misheard.

"You have two breasts. So we can milk you  and sell the milk." Anu repeated.

Mom looked at dad. She had turned red in anger.

Dad ran out of the room while trying to control his laughter.

I love my family.

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Thank you.