I'm torn.

Chapter 11.

*A few weeks later* 

"y/n you have nothing to be scared of, we haven't been caught by anyone, none of the boys know, the paparazzi are clueless, just trust me, Josh will never know about us." Zayn says trying to comfort me. I've been having trouble with this, it's been hard lying to Josh, but I don't know, I don't want to give this up with Zayn. I sound really selfish for that, I know, but I can't choose, I just can't. 

"Yeah, I guess, it's just I'm worried, and I don't want to hurt him." I say. "Whatever Josh doesn't know won't hurt him." He says. I give him a weak smile and nod. 

We were at Zayn's flat, in the living room. He walks over to the couch I'm sitting on and wraps his arm around me. "Don't worry, everything will work out." and he kisses my cheek. I put my head on Zayns shoulder & he wraps his arm around me. 

I hear the door open and Niall walks in. I quickly jump up before Niall gets in the room. "Hey what's the cr- oh hey y/n?" He says clearly confused. "Hey Niall, I was just here to get a movie from Zayn." I say. "Yeah, which one was it again?" Zayn asks, playing along. "The Hangover." I say quickly. He goes to the shelf with all the movies and scans the names of the titles before pulling one out. He stands back up and walks towards me. "Here ya go, babe." he says with a smile. Thanks Zayn, I'll bring it back soon." I say. "Yeah, just let me know." he says. "Alright, bye Niall, bye Zayn." I say, before walking out of the flat. 

God that was a close one. 

Zayn's Pov.

"Woah, what was that all about?" Niall asks me. "She wanted a movie." I say. "Oh please, you know she did not just want a movie." he says. "Yes she did." I say. "Bullshit, man. What were you two doing?" Niall asks. "Niall, we weren't doing anything, she came just before you did to get a movie and leave." I say. "Whatever you say, but just so you know, Josh is strong, really strong, be careful if you're messing around with her." Niall says. 

It's true though, Josh is way stronger than me, he obviously works out a lot more than I do, and it clearly shows. It would be a scary thing if we ever did fight, I think he would crush me. Plus, I'm really sick of him ignoring y/n lately, we work the same hours everyday, but I still see her more than he does. Why can't she see I'm the only one for her and not him? It's so frustrating. I know I told her I didn't care, but I do. I want her to choose between us. I want her to choose me or Josh. I want her to choose me. 

So do I tell her she needs to choose? Or do I just keep going with this? I really need to talk to her. 

"Hello Zaynnnnnn" Niall says. I wasn't paying attention. "Oh yeah, what's up man?" I ask. "I said, are you going out with us tonight?" he asks. "Oh, er yeah of course, whose going again?" I ask. "Liam, me, Harry, Louis, Josh, Maz, Andy, y/n..." he keeps going on but after I hear y/n's name, I know I'm going. I want to be wherever she is. 

"Yeah of course, Ni, I'll be there tonight." I say. He nods before heading out.

---

I was just waiting for y/n to get here. We've been at the bar for at least an hour. She's the only reason I'm here. 

A few minutes later I hear Louis yell "Now we're all here! Let's get the party started!" and I turn around to see her. She's in a nice dress, that fits her perfectly. She's looking stunning as always. I get up to give her a quick hug and sit back down. 

"Where's Josh?" Liam asks. "Oh he had to go run an errand, but he said he'd meet up with us in a little while." y/n says. We all get into the club and it's packed. 

I see y/n sitting by herself at the bar, and walk over to her. "You know you're looking pretty hot tonight." I mumble into her ear. She puts her head back onto my shoulder. "You're not so bad yourself Malik." she says. I smile.

"Come with me." I say pulling her to the dancefloor.

"Come on Zayn, you know I don't know how to dance." she says. "I'm going to teach you I say."

I pull her close so our hips are touching, and I gently begin to sway them together, so we're moving as one. Her hand are around my neck and before I know it our lips are connected and we're making out - not that I'm complaining. Her hands travel into my hair and mine find her bum.

"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TWO DOING?" Josh yells

shit.  

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i'm honestly really sorry this sucks so much and that it took so long to update, i promise i'll update more, just tonight was really bad, but yeah i'm sorry