The Science Joke Book

Joke 3

Two science students, Alfred and Alexander, engage in an exchange of biology jokes to determine who can crack the better joke, right before their class timings.

Alfred: "Which biochemicals wash up on the beach?

Nucleotides!"

Alexander: "What do you say about a microbiologist who visited 30 different countries and spoke 6 languages?

He was a man of many cultures."

Alfred: "What did the male stamen say to the female pistil?

I like your style."

Alexander: "A doctor invents a new kind of antibiotic.

He remarks, 'No matter how popular my antibiotics get, they will never go viral!'"

Alfred: "What do you call two dinosaurs that have been in an accident?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks."

Alexander: "What award did Gregor Mendel win for his work on genetics?

The Nobel Peas Prize, of course!"

Alfred: "Two blood cells met and fell in love, but alas!

It was all in vein!"

Alexander: "What's the difference between a dog and a marine biologist?

One wags a tail and the other tags a whale."

Alfred: "What did the femur say to the patella?

I kneed you!"

Alexander: "One plant says to another, 'Are you hungry?'

The other one replies, 'Yes, I could use a light snack.' "

Suddenly, the two have a glance at the clock and realize they are late for class.

What did Alfred and Alexander get for being late to class?

A tardigrade, er, a tardy grade. 

(Fun Fact: Tardigrades have their own phylum. 

They are essentially water-dwelling eight-legged segmented micro-animals, first described by the German zoologist Johann August Ephraim Goeze in 1773.

Tardigrades are also called water bears and moss piglets.

The word tardigrade itself means "slow-moving."

Scientists estimate that tardigrades have been around for 600 million years. To put that in perspective, dinosaurs first appeared about 230 million years ago.)