Say Okay (ON HOLD)

Chapter 42 part 2

Esmea’s pov

Louis just stood there frozen like he just saw a ghost or smelt something awful. I don’t blame him though, he’s the only person I’ve told other than my little sister, who had swarm to secrecy not to tell my mother.

I wouldn’t be welcome in the family if she knew I had gotten pregnant at the age of seventeen, she would of wanted me to have an abortion or give it up for adoption if the baby would have survived.

My mother would say stuff like you’ve ruined your life getting pregnant at this age or I would have expected better from you. Stuff like that

“Louis please say something.” I said, resting my hand on his shoulder.

“What do you expect me to say? Not only did Harry cheat on you but he also got you pregnant.” He said, shaking his head in disbelief.

“Louis I didn’t know that I was pregnant until the tour ended. I had no indication that I was pregnant. I had no stomach cramps, stomach sickness or nothing. The only thing that indicated that I could have possibly been pregnant was that I missed my period.”

“This is not how this is supposed to work. You guys were meant to grow old together with mini Harry’s and mini Esmea’s’ rubbing around begging for attention. The girls would have his curly hair while the boys would have your blonde hair.”

“Louis how many kids did you think we were going to have if we stayed together.”

“About three.magbe more. I mean you guys could keep your hands off each other so who knew how many kids you’s were going to have.” He said laughing.

“Like I said before Harry and I aren’t destined to be together like I hoped we were. It just comes to show that I was living in a fairy-tale until reality struck me that day that I caught Harry cheating on me.”

“Why are you doing this to yourself?” Louis asked.

“What are you talking about?” I asked, confused.

“You’re bidding your feelings away like you always do. It’s clear that you and Harry both love each other no matter what has happed. I think you’re just too scared to love him again. You’re just afraid of getting hurt again.”

Other that Niall Louis was the one who Igor along write the most. He can read me like a book. Sometimes that’s a good thing, but times like these aren’t so good. I mean I know I him and I know I’m scared to out my heart on the line again, to maybe get cheated on again, which is something that I don’t want to repeat.

But other people knowing me so well, so much that they can read me like a book is frustrating at times. Louis very good at reading people and its annoying because he uses it for his advantage.

And I have no doubt in my mind that he’s going to use this against me.

“Look that’s tire but I will not let you tell me that I need to tell him my feelings because it’d be a waste of time, because Harry doesn’t love me. And you telling him my feeling won’t change his mind. He’d feel guilty then he’d pretend that he likes me back and I would fall for his charms and get hurt again.”

“Esmea like I said he’s change a lot since then. He’s more matured since Trevor came along. He’s done a complete transformation. If he got a haircut and a face lift you would think it was Harry. He’s more cautious of his actions now. He respects women the same but he doesn’t use them or flirt with them.”

“Well obviously he’s change because of Trevor. I bet you anything you like Harry would have still be the charming flirty boy who tricks girls into thinking that they matter to him.”