Say Okay (ON HOLD)

Chapter 52

Esmea’s pov

Harry’s stare was making me uncomfortable; he was looking at me like I was the new animal in the zoo.

“Harry can you please stop with the staring, because it’s make me more nervous than I already am? “I asked, him playing with the ends of my hair.

“Sorry, I just don’t know what to do, or where to look or what to feel. “He said, turning his head so that he was facing the floor.

“Okay first thing you must know is that I’m sorry I haven’t told you this. No one knows about this apart from me and my parents’ kind of told Louis that I had a miscarriage, but I told him it was with your child, but I had the miscarriage with Darcy’s father. “I said.

“When did Louis find out? “Was all he asked.

“The other day. “I replied.

“The day being yesterday? “He questioned.

“Yeah, but how did you know? “I asked, confused.

“I called all the boys seeing if they wanted to do anything and they said that they were all busy. Then when I was on the phone to you I heard Niall’s voice before you hung up. I thought that it was kind of fishy, and now with you telling me this I kind of figured it out. “He said.

“Harry you can’t get angry with the boys. They did it for me.”I said.

Harry didn’t say anything.

“Anyway chase was born 6 months after the tour had finished ,I knew right away that he was your child,concidering you were my first. “I said.

“Why didn’t you say anything when you found out you were pregnant? “He asked.

“I didn’t know until the week after we broke up when I was getting morning sickness. “I said.

“How did you take the test on tour? “He asked.

“I was very sneaky. Do you remember when there was a party going on for Josh?” I asked him.

“Yeah, and you didn’t come because you were feeling sick. “He said, nodding his head.

“Well while you guys were gone I went to the pharmacy got the test and took it.”

“And it was positive?”

“Well yeah.”

“What did your mother say when you told her? “He asked.

“She blames herself for letting me go on tour with you guys. “I said, with my head hung low.

“Why?”

“Harry, my mother’s always hoped I would be married with children by the age of twenty five, not have a child at the age of seventeen. She was furious. “I said.

“It wasn’t your fault. “He said, placing his hand on my thigh.”

“I should have told you. “I said, looking up into his eyes.

“I know for a fact that I would be there with you every step of the way. “He said.

Harry saying that killed media knew he would, but I was too scared. I was afraid that he wouldn’t want to raise a child with me, even though I knew he wouldn’t run away. No because I’m the one that always runs away when things get tough. It’s always been like that since my dad passed away.

“I know. “I said, letting a tear make its way down my cheek.

“When was Chase born? “Harry asked, whipping the tear away.

“July 16th.”I said smiling.

“Mumma. I heard Chase call out.

“What is it baby? “I called back.

“Can I come out now? “He asked.

“Sure baby. “I said. Before I heard his little feet patter against the floorboards.

“Come here little mania said, holding out my arms.

“Mumma. He squealed, before running towards me at full speed.

“How’s my little man? “I asked, spinning him around.

“Happy. “He giggled.

“And whys that? “I asked, kissing his temple.

“Because we’re all a family. “He said, before smoking at harry.

“Yeah.”I said

“Dada. “Chase said, holding his arms out towards harry.

“Hey buddy. “Harry said, taking chase from me.

“I’ve missed you so much dada. It’s been so long.”Chase whimper into Harry’s neck.

“Hey styles are tough men, they don’t cry. “Harry said, smiling as he rubbed chase’s back.

“I’m a Styles? “Chase asked, whipping his tears away from his eyes.

“Yep.”Harry said, popping the p.

“How come Mumma isn’t a styles then? “Chase asked confused.

“Mumma and I aren’t married. “Harry explained to him, before he sat down on the sofa, with chase in his lap.

“Why not? “Chase asked, playing with Harry’s hair.

“It’s hard to explain. “Harry said.

“You have hair like me.”Chase said, pulling a strand of his hair, before looking at Harry’s hair.

“Indeed you do. “Harry said, poking his cheeks, making chases dimples stick out, which made harry smile from ear to ear.

“You have that too. “Chase said, amused before poking at Harry’s cheeks. Mumma doesn’t. “Chase said pointing out the obvious.

“That’s right, but you have your Mumma’s nose. “Harry said, gently poking chase’s nose.

“I do? “He asked, his eyes widening.

“Yep.”Harry said, smiling at me.

Telling harry was the right thing to do.

Then why does it feel like I’ve made the biggest mistake of my life?