"I wanna live while we're young, we wanna live while we're young." I sang, trying to not let my voice shake, but of course it did. The music stopped and the man who was set to record the song came in to the recording room while Harry sat in one of the corners smiling as if saying 'told you so'. I knew I couldn't sing.
"Louis what's up with you today? You've sang this a millions of times why are you so..." Micheal, as the man was named, tried.
"Bad." I continued for Micheal, but Micheal looked surprised.
"No it's not bad it's..." he said searching for the right word.
"Awful."
"NO Louis! It's not bad or awful it's just a bit of shaky... You need to relax and focus." said Micheal and I nodded, I knew it was awful he just don't want me to lose faith in myself. A bit too late now. "Okay, we'll take it from the beginning again."
***
I sighed as Harry and I walked into our shared apartment. Today had been shit, we had been rehearsing for hours because of my shaky voice. If I could sing we would have gotten away a lot earlier. In two days they had a concert and I wasn't sure I would make it.
"You're a awful singer you know, and today was the worst I've ever heard." Harry said as he closed the door.
"Please Harry, I know." I said without really thinking it over.
"What?" Harry asked.
"I know I'm awful but it doesn't make me better when you're telling me it all the time." why was I telling him this? Harrys eyes widened and looked at me in shock. Why was he shocked?
"Good but I'm not going to stop 'cause no one else tells you." said Harry trying to sound cool, but it was something else in his voice too. I couldn't really put my finger on it, but it was something...
"Yey." I answered, sarcasm filling my voice. Harry looked at me for a while before he got up to his room. Harry had almost looked like he regretted something, but what could that be? Did he regret that he told me the truth about my voice?
I walked up to my room and stopped in front of the full body sized mirror. Why was I so bad? Why couldn't I sing? Why couldn't I even make the tea taste good? What had I done to deserve to be bullied by someone who was right?
Without a second thought I took up his laptop, but then hesitaded a bit, was this a good idea? Whatever. I opened the laptop slowly and took up Google. Louis Tomlinson the first proposals was is Gay, is ugly, can't sing and then there was those normal like Twitter, Facts, Wikipedia and so. A sting came to my heart when I read them. Is Gay that's kind of true, but still I knew they thought about it as a bad thing. Is ugly lame, but true. I was the ugliest in the band. Can't sing it has been proven too many times, I'm just not good. I searched on Louis Tomlinson hate and millions of proposals popped up in a second. I clicked at the first one.
How can anybody even like him? He's so ugly and have you heard his voice? It's pathetic. One Direction would be much better without that gay twat. I clicked back and then opened a new file.
Like seriously, think about it. His voice is not even close to be as good as the others it always trembles and it sounds like he has a sour throat. You've all noticed he has the less solos, so he needs to be worse than the others. And his look, he is twenty, like who is twenty years old and wear red pants, stripes and suspenders? Like suspenders! It's awful! And his hair, it's like he never styles it, I know it supposed to be like that but it doesn't make him hot, he doesn't dress in it. And his face have you seen his teeth, they're uneven and his lips are so thin. He doesn't look like a popstar, he looks like a five year old who dresses himself for the first time!
It's not weird he has least fans and most haters.
I clicked away and felt myself shaking before I noticed the tears. But I couldn't stop now, so I opened a Tumblr side.
Louis Tomlinson, the name that makes me sick. He's an overexposed, ugly, bad, stupid popstar. He doesn't deserve to be in One Direction, he should be in a psychiatric home. I'm sure he got a diagnose or whatever. First: no one can be that stupid. In the video diaries, he tries to be funny but he's not! I'm sure the boys just laughed to make him feel better or because it looked better on the outside if they did. Second: He's NOT a good singer it's worse than when I sing and I'm tune deaf. Like his voice is so annoying no matter if he sings, laugh or just talks. It's terrible, he should just shut up all the time. Third: He's ugly, his dress code is the worst I've ever seen, I know he's gay -like who doesn't- but he doesn't need to dress like it! It's disgusting! And last but not least, I'm sure at least one of the boys bullies him for this and make sure he knows that he's worthless. 'Cause that what he is.
Louis Tomlinson is worthless.
I sobbed trying to keep quiet but failed miserably. She was right about everything, okay I was not sick but I acted like it! I'm not funny, I'm stupid, my voice is annoying, I'm ugly, I'm gay, Harry bullies me and make sure I know who and what I am.
A worthless overexposed idiot.
