Sain Clare Academy (gxg, 18+)

Chapter Eighteen

My smile was watery as she examined my tears with a concerned gaze, her hands moving to caress the sides of my face as if I were a delicate glass doll. Our bodies were close, almost touching, and I felt my hands clench against the fabric of her shirt.

"You are breathtaking," I told her, voice brittle and high from crying. Though my tears blurred my vision, being so close to her allowed me to see how beautiful she really was. Her eyes of justice, which saw everything with fairness and compassion. Her mouth which told no lies, only scalding truths, lips I knew were wasted pressed against my own when they could be doing something like changing the world. Her soft skin was supple beneath my fingertips, and a wobbly giggle escaped me despite myself.

How naive I was, to think I could escape this face, these hands, this person.

It was as if the Goddess placed a curse upon the Eclaire family-- to kill all of us until only I was left, still gift me with strong magic, and place me invariably under the care of one of the royals I detested so much.

I would have to live watching her silver hair for the rest of my life as she rose to the top, after she would cast me aside as a stepping stone. Morgan Eclaire was nothing to her but a tool, and once Olivia disappeared I would have nothing left of Grace Belloway as my own.

"I pray for the day you look at me without only seeing my hair," she said quietly, voice tight. I stepped back, and she let her hands drop from my face.

"I fear that day will never come," I replied, smile wavering slightly. The room was empty, which meant that Katarina had decided to give us space. I would have to thank her. Grace laughed bitterly, twisting a strand of silver around her finger.

"I wonder when it was that I began to hate my own hair," she said, and I watched her silently. Don't-- your hair is beautiful, I thought. "It was probably long before I met you, though the look in your eyes whenever you saw me only stirred the feeling up more. I don't know what my family did to you, and I know that I can never cleanse my blood completely of the sins I have inherited. Still..." She turned her head wistfully, tightening her grip around her hair so it was straining in her grasp. When it didn't tear, she let it go.

"It may be selfish, but I want to become a good duchess for the sake of my family. So that they may be washed of their sins under my hand. Not so noble of me, is it?" She chuckled, the sound low. "Perhaps I should say that I want to become a benevolent ruler to build from the rubble my blood created; for the people's sake. But still..."

"We are all slaves to our families, in the end," I surmised, trying to lighten the air with a smile.

"I know my family may have done something horrible to you, but--" She started, and I cut her off.

"Don't say it. I understand." Since I had decided to give in, anyway, I moved so I was pressed up against her, moving my hands to rest on her back. She stiffened before relaxing and wrapping her arms around me. I closed my eyes, breathing in her sweet scent. She was tall and steady and warm, and standing like this felt better than I could have imagined.

I would surely regret this, but for now, I would give in.

"Olivia, I..." she began. I waited for her to finish her thought. When she didn't, I let my eyes flicker open.

"Hmm?"

"...It's nothing," she replied as she rested her chin on my head. I squeezed my arms tight around her.

For now, everything was okay.

...

My body felt oddly light as I scrubbed my hands together under the rather high-end faucets in the staff bathroom. Plumbing was expensive, but it made sense that a place like Sain Clare Academy could afford the magical stones necessary to allow fresh water to stream directly into its facilities.