Chapter 10

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“All I need's a little love in my life

All I need's a little love in the dark

A little but I'm hoping it might kick start

Me and my broken heart

I need a little loving tonight

Hold me so I'm not falling apart

A little but I'm hoping it might kick start

Me and my broken heart

Yeah...

Shot gun, aimed at my heart, you got one

Tear me apart and then some”

Louis interrupts my singing. “You sing what you feel, huh?” He studies my expression as he sits beside me on my bed, my guitar on my lap. “Yeah,” I shrug, brushing him off. “Then sing another song,” He commands, making himself comfortable. “Why?” I can’t help but ask.

“Please? I need to understand something,” He takes his bottom lip between his teeth and releases it a second after. An action I’ve seen done by him a lot so I guess it’s a habit of his.

I dig through my mental iTunes to try to pick the right song to match my feelings. I got one.

“Closed off from love, I didn't need the pain
Once or twice was enough and it was all in vain
Time starts to pass, before you know it you're frozen

But something happened for the very first time with you
My heart melted to the ground, found something true
And everyone's looking 'round, thinking I'm going crazy

But I don't care what they say, I'm in love with you
They try to pull me away but they don't know the truth
My heart's crippled by the vein that I keep on closing

You cut me open and I,
Keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding love
I keep bleeding, I keep, keep bleeding love
Keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding love
You cut me open

Trying hard not to hear but they talk so loud
Their piercing sounds fill my ears, try to fill me with doubt
Yet I know that the goal is to keep me from falling

But nothing's greater than the rush that comes with your embrace
And in this world of loneliness I see your face
Yet everyone around me thinks that I'm going crazy
Maybe, maybe

But I don't care what they say, I'm in love with you
They try to pull me away, but they don't know the truth
My heart's crippled by the vein that I keep on closing

You cut me open and I
Keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding love
Keep bleeding, I keep, keep bleeding love
Keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding love
You cut me open

And it's draining all of me
Oh, they find it hard to believe
I'll be wearing these scars for everyone to see

I don't care what they say, I'm in love with you
They try to pull me away but they don't know the truth
My heart's crippled by the vein that I keep on closing

You cut me open and I
Keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding love
I keep bleeding, I keep, keep bleeding love
Keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding love

You cut me open and I
Keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding love
I keep bleeding, I keep, keep bleeding love
Keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding love

You cut me open and I
Keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding love” 

I finish with the last chord and put my guitar back on it’s stand. “So you’re in love with one of us?” His words switch something in my brain. In... Love? Am I? “I don’t know...” I don’t sound fully convinced and you can’t really blame me - I did just sing my feeling and they happened to be about being in love...

“I guess I am,” I conclude, certain of my answer. He nods in understanding but I can see the confusion in his eyes. “Is it me?” His question startles me. “Can we move on from that subject please?” I plead him, purposefully avoiding his question. I don’t want to risk stuttering and messing it up.

“Ok,” He agrees, lying back on my bed. “Are we best friends?” I don’t know what brought me to ask but I just did. “Yeah, of course,” He grins, pulling me back onto the bed with him. I fall on top of him and he flips me over so he’s straddling me, starting to tickle me.

I struggle out of his grasp and run across the room. He doubles over in laughter and I naturally feel myself being drawn back to him. His laughter echoes around the room and I can’t help but join in. I don’t want to ruin the perfect sound but it’s contagious.

“You can be the peanut butter to my jelly,” I whisper as our laughter dies down. Hopefully, he didn’t hear my out-loud thinking. “You can be the butterflies I feel in my belly,” He responds, me mentally cursing to myself. To cover up, I laugh and continue.

“You can be the captain and I can be your first mate.”

“You can be the chills that I feel on our first date.”

“You can be the hero and I can be your sidekick.”

“You can be the tear that I cry if we ever split.”

“How do you know these lyrics?” I giggle, my tongue between my teeth while I grin at him. “YOU CAN BE THE RAIN FROM THE CLOUD WHEN IT’S STORMING-” I decide to cut him off before my sister thinks a cat is dying and rushes in to save it.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” I roll my eyes jokingly, pulling my wavy blonde mess into a bun and lying back on the bed. I close my eyes and let myself drift off after the reeeaaalllyyy long day I’ve just had. After a couple minutes I feel Louis’ weight on the bed as he lies down. Keeping my eyes closed I desperately try to sleep and with him right there next to me, it seems much easier.

“Or you can be the sun when it’s shines in the morning,” I hear his voice as I drift off. I must have been imagining it, Louis wouldn’t whisper that to me if he thought I was asleep... Or even if I was awake he wouldn’t say it as if he meant it... Whatever, I guess I’m going mad.

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