VIRUS - Redemption

TWENTY-TWO

12.20.2038

Two days had passed since I killed Yassim. Two whole days.

I hadn't heard one thing from anyone about it. I hadn't seen Patrick, no one had come to ask questions. We were delivered another meal this morning, but Wyatt said nothing between opening the door, sliding our food in and closing the door.

I hadn't told Killian. I couldn't bring myself to. I felt like if I was to tell him would be doing myself and Patrick a disfavour. I wouldn't know how Killian would react. I couldn't tell if you would support my actions, encourage them, or trying compare himself to me, and how I treated him only a few days ago. Honestly, I felt guilty.

I had shut Killian out, for basically doing the same thing as me. He killed to protect himself, and others that he can about. I killed to protect myself, and my family that are waiting to be back in London.

Deep down, I had a gut feeling that Killian would accept me, but at the same time, they knew what he would think. I think that he would be disappointed in me going against my morals like I have. Forgetting who I was. Forgetting the Elle, I was when we left London. Maybe I had forgotten who I was when I left London.

"When do you think we will get to see Nikita?" Killian asked randomly as we sat on either side of the room as the vault light began to dim as the night was ending.

"Why are you asking that?" I said raising my eyebrows slightly. "Do you really want to see Nikita? After everything we've been through? I just want to get out without seeing another person's face."

"I don't know, all this time in this room has led me to ask a lot of questions to myself that I feel I can't answer personally. I feel like I'm owed a lot, specifically from her." He said leaning his head back against the wall, taking a deep breath. "Don't you want answers?"

"I can't think of anything I need an answer to." I shook my head softly, "I think I have so many questions, that none of them seem more important or come to mind when I think of what I would ask Nikita if she was standing in front of me. They are so muddled together, and so all equally valid that it would take me hours to find out everything that I want to find out. And if I have to choose between that, or no questions at all, and I just live whatever time I have left in the dark, I would honestly choose that."

"I think you're just scared, Eleanora." He said, his eyes finding mine from across the room, "I think if you had the chance to know what really happened with Luther and Nikita, I think you would be too scared to hear it."

"I don't agree."

"Of course, you won't agree." Killian sighed deeply, "I know you don't want to show weakness I'm being 100% honest when I say that you are one of the strongest and brave people that I have ever known. I know you don't want to talk about your father, but what that man put you through is something that I nor anyone that I know could imagine."

"You don't have to be nice to me." I shook my head, "I was so horrible to you only a few days ago, and I appreciate you helping me sleep at night by staying with me, but you don't have to pretend to in any way admire me."

"Elle, please."

"I don't need sympathy."

"I just called you scared, don't take this as sympathy." He said. He licked his lips, his legs out in front of him while he crossed his arms. "I am simply trying to say, that if we get the chance to talk to Nikita, we take it."

"But -"

"You've got the words inside of you, Elle." He interrupted, "Biting your tongue won't do you or Robert or Iris or London any favours."