West of Words (Alec Lightwood)

🗝 Chapter Forty-Four 🗝

The room wasn't his, the world wasn't his, and his mind didn't belong to him in that moment. His head was filled with screaming Downworlders, begging for his help, Varian tried to reach out to touch the minds or souls of any number of them, but they slipped through his grasp.

A twisting turmoil that Varian couldn't ease, he woke up twisted in the sheets, his mouth open in a way of shock and fear. He couldn't be sure if he was yelling, or if he had yelled, the answer came in the reply of thundering footsteps and the door being practically thrown off its hinges. Varian yelped, his mind telling him he was still in danger.

Varian threw up his hands, a dagger of unspecific magic shot through the air, a barrier formed around Varian blurring the face of the man who had entered the room.

It took three seconds for the barrier to fade and for Alec to reach Varian, a surrounding feeling of calm wrapped around Varian and he melted into it.

"I'm alright Darling." It was more for Varian's comfort than Alec's. Neither moved, finding comfort in the arms of the other. Varian was the one to lean away just slightly. "What happened while I was out."

The sigh that came from Alec alerted Varian that whatever had happened was no good. "Jocelyn made an attempt of Jace's life, Valentine and his followers are taking strong Mundane fighters from all over New York to turn into Shadowhunters, Magnus is downstairs causing a ruckus over C-"

"Baba  is here?" Varian ignored the part about him causing a scene in favor of pushing himself to his feet and holding a hand out to Alec.

Alec made a face, looking up and down Varian's form before standing. "Maybe you should-" He motioned down to Varian's rumpled shirt and creased pants. "You can borrow something of mine?"

Varian didn't have the heart to tell Alec that he could easily change his clothes with a wave of his hand when Alec smiled so brightly and turned in an excited way. Varian watched as Alec pulled a black sweater and jeans from his closet, handing them to Varian and mumbling in an embarrassed way that he would leave the room to let him change. Varian ignored him, pulling off his long sleeve shirt as he turned away from Alec, blushing brightly as he did but happy that the blush was a secret.

The fabric of the sweater swallowed Varian, the sleeves long and the hem reaching mid-thigh, it hid the fact that the top of the jeans was to big, and only after cuffing the bottom did Varian feel confident that he wouldn't loose the pants while walking around. He finished by pulling off his shoes, wincing as his wrist clicked in a funny way, the joints would never truly be the same after such a severe injury.

"Tada?" Varian asked, holding his hands out to his sides as he turned. Alec nodded, smiling and blushing as he looked Varian up and down.

"Almost." He muttered, stepping forward and taking each of Varian's hands into his, carefully rolling the sleeves so they would get in the way. "Perfect."

The action was topped off with a small kiss to Varian's lips, and despite the fact that Varian wished it was longer, he found comfort in the action and in the way that Alec led him from the room with an easy hand.

Varian watched his feet as he walked, feeling embarrassed to have spent the night in the Institute. "Did you sleep at all?" The tension that radiated from Alec let Varian know that the answer was 'no.'

"I've been trying to find the boat alongside everyone else, it's not amounting to anything." Alec sighed, his left hand moving to rub at the Parabatai rune on his hip, Varian could feel the anxiety radiating off of Alec and knew he had to do anything to help.

Despite his previous reluctance, and then later on acceptance to performing the Parabatai tracking spell, Varian didn't want to. The amount of pain and the potential chance of weakening the bond that Alec and Jace shared was to much of a worry, and Varian wasn't sure he'd be able to put Alec through that. Already he was thinking through other ways of forming a tracking union with a Downworlder on the ship, or even Jace himself.

Or perhaps a blood tracking with Valentine, despite the fear that pushed into Varian's heart at willingly forming a connection with someone that he had so quickly lost control and was eager to maim in any way just days before.

"Baba." Varian's voice cracked as he spoke, a side effect of the fear and anxious adrenaline that was currently coursing through him at the idea of forming a connection to Valentine.

Magnus Bane turned, and despite the fact that he had seen his son last night he crossed the room in a hurried way, pulling his son from Alec and wrapping his arms around him. "I can feel your magic once again little bird."

It was a reassuring statement, and Varian smiled into his baba's  shoulder before pulling away. "I see that Jocelyn is still hear, is she anymore aware?"

Teal blue flashed around his baba, showing his apologetic worry. "I may have accidentally told her about you." Varian stepped back, pulling out of his baba's  grip despite the red-blue of pain that flashed through him at the motion. "I'm so sorry Varian I-"

Varian interrupted, "It's alright." It wasn't, that was his secret to say and share, and his baba's  accidental betrayal struck a chord. He was not angry, as the action had been accidental, but he felt a pang of sadness at the reveal nonetheless.

Jocelyn Fairchild appeared in his line of sight, though her concentration was more on moving through the main area of the Institute in a hurry rather than actually looking at the Shadowhunters filling the room. Varian felt a pang of fear at her appearance, which quickly faded when she disappeared.

"I have to speak to her." He didn't want to, but he had to. Alec's hand touched Varian's hip from behind, his hand a comforting grip on reality. Varian leaned into the touch.

Alec's voice was just under a whisper, "I'll be there, if you want me."

Varian's response was quick, "Always Darling."