Failing to be his beloved (Damian Wayne robin x reader)

Bye

———-major warning——-

Damian was shot last week, he put himself in a coma to heal a bit faster, it took a week, he woke up, and he was almost completely healed, from the looks of it, it still looked sore. After that, he came and broke up with me, he said,"L/n I apologize if this might hurt you, I believe that because I was trying to look out for you, I was distracted and," he pauses,"I don't think we should be together." I stare at him all I can muster is an,"ok" I turn around and start walking, but that soon turns to running. I got to my room. Then it just went even more down from there, I didn't realize how little I hung out with everyone else, till I was always alone after a week of that, I stopped eating breakfast, two weeks I stopped training and eating lunch, school was bad too. The girls that had only called me names before had started pushing me around. I didn't want anyone else hurt because of my incompetence so I just let them. On the third week, I said I was sick, and asked Alfred if I could stay home. But that only worked for 2 days. When I went back, one of the girls shoved me really hard, I landed on my hand weird, and sprained my wrist. When I got home, I went up to my room, and started thinking about all the wrong stuff I've done, and all of the people I've hurt. Then by the fourth week, I decided, that I would kill myself, I would put in more planning, but... I don't want to die, I just want to...not be alone, or hated, or hurt.
First I tried taking to Bruce, I knocked on the door to his study,"Hey Bruce, can I come in," the door opened, he was on the phone with someone," hey y/n, what do you need?" I frowned," I was wondering if I could talk to you," he paused,"I'm a little busy right now, maybe later." I urged on,"it's kinda important." He looked at me," I said no." I looked down,"ok" I turned and got out of there as fast as I could. Next I tried to talk to Tim, steph was with him,"hey guys...can we talk?" They looked at me, steph smiled ,"of corse." Then Tim pulles her into his lap,"no...not right now," he whispered to her."steph, you promised." I looked at tim,"it's kinda important." Tim looked at me steph looked a little worried but Tim silenced it,"This is too, we can talk later ok." I nodded. Before practically running out of my room next I tried Alfred."Hey Alfred, can we talk," he smiled,"of course miss y/n" I smiled,"thank you." I say down, I was trunk to muster the courage when Jason ran in the room,"hey Alfred, you promised, that you would come and show me your gun." Alfred sighed,"No I didn't master Jason, and as you can see, I am talking to miss y/n" Jason looked at me,"Why you talking to the distraction?" Alfred looked at Jason,"Master Jason, apologize this instant, Miss y/n is no such thing." Jason rolled his eyes,"that's why demon was shot then." It felt like someone was rubbing salt in my wounds. He sighed," your right Alfred, I'm sorry y/n" I was about to say something before Jason pulled out his phone,"hey Alfred, you did promise. I got it on video." Alfred sighed,"it's really important." Alfred looked between us,"why yes it is, but Jason is persistent, we shall talk later. End of discussion." He then walked away with Jason. My final choice was Richard or Damian. I called Richard," hey, I was wondering if we could talk." He chuckled," of course y/n" I sat down," well you see-" he cut me off," hey, sorry y/n I have to go, starfires calling. I'll call you back after." With that he hung up, I waited about an hour. He never called back. I went with my last option at the moment, " Damian," I knocked at his door. He opened it and rolls his eyes," I need to talk to you." By now I was desperate to talk to anyone, even him." What do you want y/n" I looked at him," I really need to talk to someone, it's important." He looked at me, probably judging me, I e lost weight, and muscle since he left me."go talk to Grayson, he loves talking." I frown," I already tried." He frowned, " then talk to Tim or steph." I look at the ground," tried that too." He looks at me," how bout Jason. I'm sure he'd love to talk to you." I sniffled ," he's busy." He raised an eyebrow," Bruce." I let a tear fall," he didn't want to talk." He seemed slightly distraught," what about Alfred." I snuggle some more." He was busy too." Feel tears falling, I can't do this," Nevermind." I turn and run down the hallway crying," I'll be in my room, don't bother me." I open my door, and slam it behind me. I pull out my preplanned letter, separate ones for everyone who comes to the manner, ones for the team, and people I talk to, even some for the girls who push me around.  I go to the bathroom, I had been collecting any medication I could for a while now. I have a lot of them by now. I  drop  the bottle, they scatter on the floor, there are tears streaming down my face,"no...no...no..." I crouch down, and start to try to collect them back into the bottle. When they're all in, I stuff them in a small bag. I put on a nice dress, and climb out my window, I know where all the cameras are, so it's easy for me to avoid them. I get to the gate, and climb over, I run on the gravel. Till I see a cab," take me to Wayne enterprise." He starts driving, I hope he didn't see my tears, it is dark...there's still hope. He's driving slow...but I'm not in a hurry anymore. We pull up, I take the elevator to the top floor, nobody questions me, almost nobody is here though. I start counting the pills, I'm missing 5. I get to the edge, and stare at the city. I open the bottle again, and start with the first pill, it was for a headache I had, I have 4 of those. I put it in my mouth and swallow remembering why my mom died, the next was for the night I couldn't sleep, I think of when everyone laughed at me, after that, another of the headache ones, I think of when Damian got shot, because I was a distraction, this time I take 2 then I remember what the bullies said. I take about 40 before I stand in the ledge. I look out at the city, " it's beautiful." I stare for a second, then everything goes black, there's a pain in my head, and I don't know what from...