Dangerously in Love

Death

The next day, she hasn't been feeling like her self. She could sense something is wrong but she touchwood herself that she wishes there's nothing wrong with her family. 

She's thinking of Ivan like she had this bad feeling about him but she doesn't know what it is. Ivan was talking to her and promising her that he would send her his recent picture of him in the shower but no reply from him. 

So she then asked him after hours of waiting, "Where did you go, babe?" 

She can sense something is wrong like her gut feeling tells her that Ivan is going through something tremendous on his life but she doesn't know what it is. Then her thoughts going to Ivan's mother whom is sick and just been in operation, so she prays for his mum to be ok. 

Then on 9:32 PM, 23 April 2020, after a while he finally texted, "Babe." 

She immediately senses it, "What happened? Is your mum ok? My heart has been pumping like my gut feeling says there's something wrong." 

He sent her multiple crying emoji and added, "I am speechless. Everything I have worked for is all to no available." 

She's confused, "What do you mean?" 

He texted, "My mum just gave up her ghost. My mum is dead <crying emoji>." 

She tries to reassure him, "Oh no baby... Can I call you? That's why I've been feeling there's something wrong." 

He responded, "Babe, my head is full, please let me be. I'm finished. Everything. Now her body is to be put in the mortuary. Really don't have money for that. My sister is in a bad condition. She has been crying all day. The doctor just called to tell me this. I feel like I'm going crazy, baby... I'm running mad. Feels like my world is coming to an end. Everything I had, my family, my dearest mother, <Crying emoji>  I was soo close to her, baby. I was really close to her. She meant a lot to me. I wanted the best for her, baby. Death took her away from me. 2020 has been a hell of a year for me. Lost everything close to me. My friend, my contract, and now my mum is gone. This is too much for me."

At this stage, she was speechless, like she doesn't know how to react to this situation, she just said, "I'm sorry, baby. My deepest condolences for you. But you gained me, baby in this 2020."

He then texted her, "Babe, this is family. I'm talking about my mum. The only person I had."

She then keeps saying, "I'm so sorry, baby..." because she doesn't know how and what's best to be there for him but she wants to be there for him. She then recites her prayers, "Dear Jesus, I pray for strength for Ivan, as this tough times that he's facing right now. I pray that You are there for him and with him right now. Please comfort his heart, Lord Jesus. Please heal him in this grieving moment. Please be there for him and for his sister as the family going through this grief. In Jesus name, I pray, amen." 

She then sent him a youtube video of 'Be Still, My Soul' from Kari Jobe, a worship song about grief to him. 

He then begins to share his story, "Where am I starting from... Umm, I knew my mum was down when we spoke the last time. No wonder she kept on blessing me. Her last words. She was like, I made her proud... she is proud of the man I have become. Blessings and blessings would be mine. She then said she was happy to talk to me again after a long time. Then the doctor said I should leave her to rest. And that was her last words. They said after her injection last night, her temperature started rising and that wasn't normal. This morning she was feeling a lot better before she started convulsing and then gave up her ghost. My sister watched her die. She has not been her self since morning." 

All she wants to do is to call him and telling him that everything would be ok, "I let you be... I'm here for you. Call me when you are ready." She also added, "Baby, I can't imagine how you're feeling right now and I won't pretend to know the loss that you're experiencing. Please know that you're not alone and I'm just a phone call away. I love you. God bless x" 

She is confused about what and how she deals with his situation at this moment. She wants to be there for him. Hugging him and cry with him. But all she can do is to pray and wait for his calls. 

Also, even though she has blocked his 2,1 M followers account on her personal Instagram, she has other means to see that account through one of her work Instagram but she doesn't follow it intensely like she used to. 

During this course of action, of what happened to his mom, that account also has been silence for 3 days with no story posting or any post. So she then begins to think that he is telling her the truth all this time and that Ivan Dimitri is actually Ivan Boreslavski. 

She can only assume, but she knows that this connection is right. Because that account normally posted stories like every day but just so happens that on the day like today and three days after this day, that account has been inactive like sort of mourning or something like that.  

She's trying to connect that account to the real-life Ivan that she chatted every day on Whatsapp and it seems now, there's a connection during this mourning period. 

 At this stage, her trust issue is progressing into something that she wants to believe and trust him but it's now getting better as she trusts him even more than she is before. 

Selah.