the same hands that held me as a baby so lovingly
cracked open a rockstar energy drink every sunday
in the small, hot car
the smell was so disgusting, i could barely breath
the same hands cut open a fish to show me all the guts inside
getting dirty with mud as they mixed it all in the garden soil after
the same hands that hit my low back and upper legs
leaving bruises and yelling
lazy lazy lazy
the same hands that groped my breasts
gripped my thighs
dragged my body on top of his, while he ground himself against me
so smart
so beautiful
all grown up
the same hands that begged forgiveness
the same hands that held the bottle so desperately
put it to my head and finish the job
