I'll Fix You (EDITING)

chapter 1

Ari's pov

Ring Ring Ring

My alarm goes off but that's not what woke me up and I make no move to get up from my spot on the bed, I continue staring at my plain white, definitely not special, ceiling, like I've been doing for the past one hour. I've been awake since six o'clock in morning, and judging from the alarm clock and my little math technique I'm able to confirm that I was definitely correct, and in no way am I surprised, because my lack of sleep is for the same reason it has been for as long as I can remember,and that is, the feeling of emptiness in my chest that comes with a sharp pain, almost like a pinch in my chest that seems to remind me of the same thing that the universe and everyone inside in it never fails to, I'm in need of something I know I'll never get...love.

I  dismiss those thoughts from my head, because, it's always the same thing every morning, I think of that and cry till I'm too drained to face the day, but I don't necessarily have a choice so with my physically and emotionally drained self I still face the day looking like a character from the walking dead, not that anyone Cares, but I like pretending that the people with pitiful stares care, and that might be the reason I don't make much of an effort to look better. Don't judge me for that yet, I mean would you really blame me, I've never really received any form of affection in my life so I might as well take what I can get. I mean don't get me wrong I hate the attention, but sometimes it's nice to know that they at least pity me, especially if that's the closest to being cared for that I'll get.

Finally feeling the rush of reality, I remember that unlike other people I have consequences that'll be faced if I'm not off from bed immediately, and that's enough to send me running around my room like my bed is on fire. I quickly pick out a dark blue sweatshirt and a pair of black jeans and run to the bathroom, well i run while tip toeing, and gently shot the already open door as quietly as possible (they never shot the door after using it, so we know it's not in use.). Once I do my business, I get dressed and towel dry my thick black hair and run a brush through it while it's still somewhat damp and decide to let nature complete the drying.

Once done with that, I take out my completely warn out nighty I had set on the floor in the bathroom earlier and sneak back to my compartment, I dump them on the floor together with some of other dirty clothes piled up on the floor reminding me that I've got to do my laundry soon. I grab my school backpack along with my assignments I did late last night and stuff them into my backpack, and just when I think I might actually escape today I'm proven wrong.

"Ariana, why are you still here?" Mariah one of the house keepers stop's me on my way out of my room quickly pushing me back in my room and shutting the door. She turns back to me looking like she'll probably have a heart attack soon.

"Aunt Mariah, i-i I'm sorry i-i'll go before t-they notic-"but I'm not allowed to finish as she stops me.

"Stop stuttering girl",she scowls at me "and your too late they're already up."and that is all it takes for me to know I'll definitely be late to school again today and I'll probably be saying hello to detention too, the universe really hates me.

"ARIANNA!!! BREAKFAST!!!NOW!!!" I hear master shout, silencing any hope I had left I sigh and reply,

"On my way sir" I say quietly but knowing he definitely didn't hear me, I rush downstairs to get the breakfast set for them.
I serve them once I'm done.

"Morning Sir,"I say placing he's coffee down in front of him and turn to his wife"morning ma'am"I say to her hoping that I can live after this but even I know that's not possible yet.

"Morning, go make sure the kids are ready for school and pack their lunch, once you're done notify the driver that their ready to--" I zone her out cause I already know what I'm meant to do, but put out an attentive face for her, my hands rubbing together at my back reminding myself that I've got this.