"Okay." (Bbangnyu) ☑️

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Chanhee missed him. Everything from his intoxicating, infuriating smirk to the peaceful smiles he wore in his sleep.

The buzz of his phone drew him out of his thought. Who could it be this late? It was 12AM on a Thursday night! Probably a telemarketer.

"Hello?"

"It’s me." responded a familiar voice. A long pause. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have bothered you.”

"Younghoon... are you okay"

A brittle laugh followed by a light hiccup answered him.

"No. I’m unbelievably stupid and let go of the best thing that’s ever happened to me. And now I’m calling him."

Chanhee rolled out of bed almost immediately and began tugging on whatever pants and shirt were closest. He sighed in annoyance (and slight relief that Younghoon called him).

"Where are you?"

"Outside your dorm."

Younghoon was sitting on the ground not too far from the door, clearly dressed to impress. Chanhee tried to swallow down the jealously bubbling up. There was nothing wrong with finding him extremely attractive?

"Here," Younghoon said (ordered), handing Chanhee a carton of strawberry milk. "You look sick."

"It’s called depression" Joked Chanhee, obediently sipping the milk.

In the dim lighting, Younghoon saw the paleness of his face not from foundation, and the circles under his eyes were from lack of sleep.

"You haven’t been taking care of yourself!"

"It’s not your job to lecture me anymore," he snapped. "No, that wasn’t...I didn’t mean that. I’m sorry."

"It’s okay. I’m the one who should be sorry, about everything. For ignoring you." Glancing over, Chanhee looked miserable and slightly embarrassed. "You know what’s stupid? I think...I found out too late, that you mean the world to me." he mumbled, barely audible.

"Stop. Younghoon, you don't mean that.” He stomped down on the glimmer of hope before it could start to bloom, not wanting to get his hopes up for a few words Younghoon may not even mean. "If you're just gonna sit there sulking then come inside, its cold out here." He turned to go inside.

Younghoon's heart hurt.

"You shouldn’t be so nice all the time. You should be mad, you should be telling me to fuck off. Why are you so nice? I can’t...I don’t know what to do. Just let me do something nice for you for once, to thank you...for liking me. I owe you much more, and I know it’s too little too late," he added, quieter.

Chanhee stood stunned, in the doorway to his own dorm. He knew he should say something, but his brain wasn’t working. Good thing he was facing away from Younghoon or he’d see his mouth open and close ungracefully like a goldfish as he tried to find the words. Needing to process those words from Younghoon, he walked inside to give himself a few moments to think.

Younghoon followed him into the room shortly after. “Sorry... I'm mad, at myself I mean, and I spoke rashly.”

“No...I’m working on it, on being less selfless. What did you mean you owed me?” Chanhee took a sip of the strawberry milk and it tasted like happiness.

His guest winced. “I owe you for being a jerk. I didn't know what really happened with that video and I just jumped to conclusions. I should’ve asked you about it."

Chanhee lowered his drink slowly to stop himself from slamming it down.

“Right. You should have. But you didn't.”

Raising his hands in surrender, Younghoon huffed, “I’m learning, I’m learning. You are incredible and...and I remember what I said and I still mean it. You mean the world to me. I miss you.”

It was difficult not to comfort him, but Chanhee couldn’t risk falling again.

“What about Changmin?"

“I was drunk, and he took advantage.”

“I thought I was just some...toy to you.”

"You’re not! You never were." Younghoon fell onto his knees, grabbed his wrist, and met his eyes. "Look at me. I've talked to Changmin. He understands now. I can’t go back and fix it but please...please don’t do this yourself, Chanhee. It was my fault. I’ll do anything you ask for you to forgive me."

"I... I forgive you."

"Okay... a-are you sure? Let me know...if-"

He was cut off by a kiss, chaste and lingering.

"Yes. I’m sure, Younghoon, I forgive you." Chanhee smiled at Younghoon's sharp inhale, the way his body looked more tense, and the change in his dark eyes. Effortlessly, Younghoon rose and carried Chanhee to the couch, placing him down slowly and kissing his lips as if they had all the time in the world.

“This is okay right?” Younghoon asked. 

Seeing his affirmative nod, Younghoon dipped his head down and deepened the kiss. Chanhee felt that he was floating, he had missed this. It was as if each kiss was an apology and an “I love you.”

-

um so this... is the end... except 1 more bonus chapter! woop! (im sorry)