DREAMING || YOONMIN [COMPLETE]

30: Moving On

Jimin was upset when the break ended, to say the least. He and Yoongi were busy with so many projects that they didn't get to see each other as often, if at all. They mostly said hello to each other when they were passing by on the sidewalk, or when they saw each other on campus.

Which was strange, considering that Jimin never used to see him at all. He just appeared somehow, almost like he was never there in the first place. But he knew that Yoongi had transferred with some classes from Daegu, so that was enough explanation for him. He did say that he refused to set a foot outside for a majority of his first time there.

The weather was growing colder, snow falling in higher layers since his classes started up again. Jimin's feet always got soaked whenever he went outside in his boots, rendering them useless as he could feel the coldness of the water through them. He was basically barefooted any time he went outside.

Since he couldn't really go on walks at this point, he was laying in bed with his cat, Moon. His hair was freshly washed, tangly, and still a bit damp. He couldn't be bothered enough to get out of bed and find his towel.

His eyelids were pushing down against his eyes, feeling heavy. He swore that a few moments earlier he was just fine, but assumed it was simply a lack of good sleep and that he needed to rest more. So he lay his head down on the pillow, tracing patterns with a finger that wasn't tucked under his comforter.

It was relaxing to not think for a short time; it was healing for him. He didn't need to think about anyone or anything, he just needed to worry about himself for the time being. Having that spare time for himself was so hard to come by when he spent all of his time worrying how his image looked. It was nice for the short time that it lasted.

As he was drifting off to sleep, there was a loud noise outside that woke him up. It startled him into an upright position eyes wide awake even though he was trying desperately to let himself slip away from the world. There was no more noise after some time, so he flopped back onto the pillow, letting his eyes close.

Sleep didn't come as he waited for it, counting sheep and staring at the cracks on the ceiling, counting how many there were, how tall they were, and eventually got bored of that too.

After about ten more minutes of waiting, lying there with his eyes open, staring holes into the ceiling, he wasn't falling asleep, so he sat back up. Moon was startled by his sudden movement after so long, jumping off his leg. The cat decided to leave him and wander into a different room. He hoped that room wasn't Jeongguk's, remembering how he had accidentally left the door open earlier and was too lazy to close it.

Jeongguk would most likely be upset with him for that.

Then, he curled up, finally realizing that he was completely alone. Physically. He didn't like being alone anywhere, at any time or place.

It would be nice if this whole thing hadn't happened in the first place, but he wouldn't have had the time to completely comprehend his position in the world if it hadn't. It helped him understand some of his flaws, and notice the world around him for once, not constantly concentrating on what his image looked like.

He tucked his hands up under his chin and started to cry, silently feeling weak again for the thousandth time in his life. The tears rolled down without control, curving over the edges of his cheeks, puddling under his chin, and wetting the pillow he was attempting to sleep on. Much to his discomfort, it made the spot beneath his cheek wet.

Not wanting to move, he remained like that for a few hours until his eyelids finally shut, and at long last, he was able to fall asleep.

★★★