DREAMING || YOONMIN [COMPLETE]

45: Belated Realization

It had been barely a few weeks, and yet Jimin still hadn't managed to tell Yoongi anything. He was too scared to see the older's reaction, afraid that he might have calculated something wrong. Deep down, he knew that he should probably just trust Jeongguk's judgement, but there was another side of him that pulled him away from that. The neverending question: what if Jeongguk was wrong?

What would Jimin do then?

Throughout the time he'd spent away from Jeongguk, Yoongi and Jimin had been talking. Over the phone, nothing more. Yoongi still didn't know that they had broken up, purely because Jimin had been too afraid to tell him. He was planning to do it during one long call, except that Yoongi had conveniently forgotten about something and was unable to stay any longer.

When he thought about it more, Jimin hadn't even planned anything to say. It would've sounded like he was coming up with everything on the spot, and he didn't want it to seem like he was lying. Yoongi would probably be able to tell when he was lying by this point in their friendship, whatever it was about.

The encounter with his nerves had prevented him from telling Yoongi for fear that he might sound desperate. Desperate for what, he didn't know, but he just didn't want to say anything. So he strayed away from the topic whenever he could sense Yoongi getting close to asking anything about Jeongguk or his boyfriend, which he didn't have anymore.

He'd heard small talk of the boy from Taehyung, but other than that, he had been told that Jeongguk needed space. It was understandable, of course, and he wasn't surprised, especially since this had been so draining for him. But he was glad that Taehyung had been noticing minor improvements. From getting up to eating more or actually cleaning himself, Jeongguk had begun to do things on his own after a week to a week and a half.

Jimin didn't know how Taehyung had been able to coax a stubborn Jeongguk into stomaching more than one bite of food, but he praised him for it and continued to wait for updates on the younger boy's behavior. The updates had been coming at a relatively slow pace, which didn't surprise him much. Taehyung was probably seeing to it that Jeongguk ate and was feeling at least okay every second of the day, leaving him little to no time to talk to Jimin. The thought of the two being so supportive of each other made him smile a little before remembering his situation, the small curve dropping low into its previous nervous frown.

He sat on his couch, phone tight in his palm. He felt too bad to tell Yoongi something like this over the phone. As conflicting as it was to debate between talking in real life, where he might get emotional, and over the phone, where he wouldn't be able to convey enough emotion, breaking up with Jeongguk was not something that he had taken lightly, and it felt wrong to him to simply tell him over the phone instead of in person. Sounding so monotone about a breakup would be unsettling to him and probably to Yoongi, too, so he wanted him to be able to see his emotions through his expressions rather than through his voice over a device.

So he sat there, stuck between whether or not he should ask Yoongi to meet up with him somewhere. It had been a while since he'd last seen him, and he couldn't lie and say that he didn't miss the older boy's company. Not seeing his smile for an overly long period of time was really starting to get to Jimin in a way he didn't like, the need to see him crawling and making a home under his skin. He just had to hope that Yoongi had felt the same.

It had been a long time, longer than he could keep track of. Their time apart was a whole month and counting. So he couldn't be blamed for missing him, could he? He didn't think so, but it still crept up on him each time he thought about it, pulling him back by his shoulders away from the decision he'd been so close to making.

But it would be a better idea, he knew it would be better to convey the truth to him in person, just so that he could gauge his reaction. Again, for what, he didn't know, but it didn't matter that much to him. Perhaps it was just an excuse to get to see Yoongi again. He didn't feel so terrible about making excuses to see the older boy again. He had little to no reason to worry, so it didn't seem like such a horrible choice.