Chapter Eleven
Thug Tears
Lauren
I woke up in the bed with Natalie lying on top of me. I didn't feel Quin's presence. I carefully laid Natalie down beside me without me waking her. I eased out of the bed and slipped on my black fuzzy house shoes. I walked into the kitchen. Quin was sitting at the island with his head down. I heard him silently crying. "What's wrong baby?" I rubbed his back.
It was the first time I ever heard Quin cry. I didn't like it all. I knew it was something serious because he wasn't the type to cry. I continued to rub his back. Quin sat up with a face full of tears. My heart felt sad. I
grabbed a paper towel and wiped his face. "Talk to me."
"I miss my brother." He said finally. "What happened to him?" I sat down beside him. "About three years ago, I got a call. It was my cousin. He was like 'wassup b'." The tears started to form up in his eyes again. "He told me the nigga kilt my brother man. I seen him laid out in the fuckin' street. Eighteen years old. He ain't even get to live a life. Every since then, I been in these streets. I ain't got no hope or faith left. I had pure hatred in my heart until I met you. I wanted to become a rapper and singer but I don't believe in dreams no mo'. I don't like living this lifestyle but, it's the only choice I had. My brother was my best friend."
By the time Quin finished talking, I had tears in my eyes. I could feel Quin's pain. I heard the sound of hurt in his voice. I hugged Quin, comforting him. He sobbed into my chest as I rubbed his back. "Baby, I don't know how it feels to lose a sibling. I can only imagine. You've got to understand that he's in a much better place. It's okay to miss him but never question God. And all you need is a little faith, just a pinch. I guarentee you, you will make it. These streets ain't the way. Plus, you have Natalie now. You can turn your life around real quick. I think you should get back in the studio. I'll be here to support you every step of the way."
I hugged Quin a little tighter. He looked at me. "Thank you baby. Imma do this for him and my baby girl. Sorry you had to see me like this. Thugs don't cry." I laughed at him. "Them thug tears. Everybody need to let it out sometimes." Quin grabbed my waist as he kissed me. I pulled away. "Boy you better stop that before something get started."
"That's what I want." He laughed. I shook my head at him as I was walking back to my bedroom. Natalie had gotten up, just looking around. "Pretty girl has finally woken up." I smiled at her. She giggled a little. "Did me daddy cook breakfast?" I shook my head no. "Not yet. How about you take a bath first. When you finish, I'll cook you breakfast. What do you like?"
"Egg and pancake." She said sweetly. I wanted Natalie to like me. I wanted her to look at me as another mother. I knew we'd never have a bond like she had with her mother. Just a bond was fine. I ran Natalie's bath water for her and she got into the tub. Quin walked into the bathroom. "Do she have any clothes?" I asked him. "Yeah, her momma bought some earlier. I'll go get em'." He walked out. I sat down on the sink. "If it not about the money, don't be bowin me up." Natalie started to sing. I laughed at her. This little girl here is just too cute.
Quin brought me a Mickey Mouse bookbag. I picked out a pair of denim jeans and a long sleeve pink Nike shirt. When she finished bathing, I helped her put on her clothes. I put her long, curly brown hair into a ponytail.
"Awe, my baby girl so pretty." Quin said to Natalie as we were walking out of the bathroom. He picked her up and spun her around. She laughed as she kicked her legs. They followed me into the kitchen. "Baby you don't have to cook, I will. I know you been workin' and shit and you need some rest." Quin kissed me. See how sweet my baby is. "Thank you baby." I smiled at him. I was glad that Quin volunteered to cook. Working a few extra hours had my bones aching.
