~Jess' POV~
I was taking Ruby out on a day trip today, somewhere special that she would remember for a long time. She had always mentioned that she wanted to attend a rehearsal for one of my shows. She's usually either been backstage with Alisha or the crew whilst I've been on stage, or been in the audience with my parents. After all, she obviously couldn't go with Scarlett.
It was only a rehearsal as said, so she sat front row. I walked on stage and adjusted my earplugs and took the microphone from its holder. ''Sweet talker, sweet talker.'' I sang, making sure the microphone was working properly. There have been countless times it hasn't been!
''Mummy! Sing Gold for me!'' It was her favourite, I obliged and sang the chorus for her. ''Yay! Go Mummy!'' She cheered, clapping her hands and jumping around, excited.
The crew tested their instruments and soon enough we were ready to run a couple of the songs. I moved around the stage to make sure everything was ok and I could easily access every part of it. You'd be surprised the amount of times I've tripped over! ''Is it ok if we switch up the set list slightly and put Mamma Knows Best after Nobody's Perfect and take out Excuse My Rude?''
''Sure, doing it now.'' Someone called from the darkness. That sounds dramatic, it was at the back of the concert hall and only the stage lights were on!
It was over before I knew it. I wanted a longer day out really. Ruby and I were in the car on the way back to the house. It wasn't really what we could call a home, was it?
So, I decided to take a little detour, Ruby was being treated like shit by Scarlett and I wanted to spoil her rotten today. You've got to take good care of your family, haven't you? I parked up on a side road somewhere and carried Ruby into her favourite ice cream shop. Well, I said this was for her... I kind of like ice cream too. Ice cream is good.
We both had a cone with four scoops of ice cream on it. Four different flavours. It didn't stop there either, we put lots of other shit on it. Sprinkles, chocolate sauce, nuts, all of that jazz. I mean, if you're going to have ice cream, you have to go all out, don't you?!
Ruby insisted on sitting on one of those stools. Obviously with my long legs, that wasn't a problem. I was paying for the ice cream and when I turned around I saw her attempting to hoist herself onto the stool. It was hard enough just watching her do it, I couldn't imagine how hard she was trying!
I went up behind her and patted her bum, lifting her onto the stool. She was breathless, the poor thing. Before I could even say 'try not to get brain freeze', she had begun slurping the ice cream. Yes, that's right. She didn't use the little spoon provided. It was funny to watch, when she put the bowl down, her nose was covered in ice cream and sprinkles. How could I not take a picture of this fabulous moment? Lock screen photo? Definitely.
''Mummy, can I ask you something?'' She spoke up, putting her ice cream onto the surface in front of us. She stuck the little spoon into the scoop, she decided to use it after all!
''Anything, sweet pea. What is it?'' She paused for a moment, almost not wanting to ask the question.
''Does mummy love me?''
Tears formed in my eyes, it hurt. Like lots of tiny needles were being stuck into them all at once. The little girl who was sat next to me; my daughter, had to actually ask that, like she needed to be reassured. It was painful for the both of us for her to ask that. She didn't know whether her own mother loved her. That was horrible to even think about.
''Yes, of course she does. Why?''
''Well... She never talks to me any more.''
''Mummy is having a tough time right now. You know sometimes when you get upset?'' I asked her, it would make more sense if she could relate to it. I was going to have to use a few metaphors.
''Yeah.''
''Well, she's like that at the moment. She's fighting through it like a big girl and she's going to be a superhero. Mummy got a little lost and she's trying to find her way home. None of that doesn't mean she doesn't love you. She loves you more than anything.'' I explained as well as I could, I just hoped she would be able to understand.
''More than anything?''
''Anything.'' I confirmed, I needed to make sure she knew that Scarlett loved her. We both did.
''Even you?'' Oh she did make me laugh sometimes.
''How about we share her?'' I winked, touching the end of her nose slightly. She was so small, I towered over her. She smiled cheekily and my heart melted there and then. She picked up her spoon and dug out a humongous mouthful of ice cream and shovelled it into her mouth.
''I love you, mummy.'' She murmured through the ice cream.
''And I love you, Rubes.''
''Do you think mummy will find her way home soon?'' She was quizzical today. But I guess if I'm honest with myself, children do ask lots of questions. I'd rather her ask questions than to be sat there worrying, scared of asking anything.
''I don't know how long it'll be, but when she does, we have to act like she never left, yeah? Otherwise she may get lost again and that'll put everyone in a muddle!'' I made that sound like a joke, for both of our benefits, not just hers.
''Deal.''
''Shall we shake on it, partner?''
''Let's!'' Her tiny hand shook mine and in that moment, life was good.
A/N: Sorry if there's any mistakes, I wrote this super quick!
