Unfortunately Fated

Chapter 20

Jonathan

        I was currently sitting in an all-white room with nothing but a table and two chairs in the middle. Since my emotions being turned on again and me being myself, I've been able to have visitors yet. I was nervous to see them again, especially after everything. I was still in handcuffs just in case I reverted, but I doubt that'll happen. The door opens, and Taylor ran in and sat across from me. She wasn't allowed to touch me just yet; I was still heavily watched. "Jonathan?" I could feel that she was hesitant, wanting to know if I was there. "Yeah, it's me." I gave her a small smile. She screamed in excitement; I closed my eyes in pain. The screeching hurting my ears. "Oh, I'm sorry! I forgot you haven't been around a bunch of loud noises." Her eyes were filled with an emotion I couldn't quite recognize. Concern? No. Sorrow? No. Pity? Maybe. "How long have I been in here?" I asked her. 

        She looked around the room, kind of debating whether to tell me or not. "How long have I been in here?" She took a deep breath and leaned back in the chair. "Two months. But it doesn't matter. I am just glad that you are okay! And that you're going to be out of here soon!" She grabbed my hands in hers, breaking the rules, but I guess she didn't care. "How is he?" This was the real question I wanted to have answered.

      "He's okay. I know it doesn't mean much coming from me, but he feels terrible for what he has done to you. He came here every day while you were in therapy. He even went to some himself. He wants to be better, and despite everything, he is better at how he talks and interacts with others. He misses you, though. He talks about you every day, brings up all the memories you guys had." My heart fluttered when she told me that. "So, he's not mad at me for almost killing him?" I chuckled lightly, trying to make light of the situation. "No, he's not." A man walked in, signaling that it was time for her to leave. "Look, I have to go. But I will be back tonight to get you. Unless you want Maxwell to..." Did I want him to pick me up? Did I want to see him? Was I ready to see him? I mean it had to happen at some point, might as well be today. "Okay yeah, sure." She got up and was escorted out of the room. Dr. Robinson walked in and sat down in the same chair. "You are leaving, are you excited?" She asked me. "Yes. I am ready to get back to the real world." 

       "Are you ready to see Maxwell. Look, it's one thing talking about seeing him, being around him is another. Just be careful, don't overstimulate yourself. Take it slow because it can be overwhelming, it will be overwhelming." Dr. Robinson got up and walked over to my side of the table. She uncuffed me and it was the best feeling ever. "Come, let's go pack your bags and get you home."

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        I was in the waiting room, my leg was bouncing up and down and my nerves were uncontrollable. I kept running my fingers through my hair. My eyes bounced from door to door waiting. I was starting to think that maybe they forgot about picking me up. "Jonathan." His voice was music to my ears, his scent the most wonderful smell I had ever smelled. The lavender, apple, and cedarwood. A smell that made me melt on the inside. I turned to him and I almost forgot how breathtaking he was. But his usual long silky blonde hair was now short and styled. I never thought that I would like his hair short, but he looks absolutely gorgeous. His bright green eyes weren't at their usual shine, but still just as beautiful. I stood up so fast, I got slightly light-headed. "Maxwell," I said softly. He gave me a soft smile, he walked forward and grabbed my bags from the chair. I followed him outside to his car and got into the passenger seat. The tension was thick and uncomfortable. I didn't know how to feel about it. He got in the car and he started driving away, and I hope I never have to see that place ever again. 

        "So, um. I moved from my parent's house. I have my own, well for both of us. If that's okay with you?" Maxwell clenched the steering wheel, and I could feel his anxiety flooding off of him. "Uh yeah, wherever is fine." It was silent again in the car, I wish it wasn't so weird for us to be together again. "You cut your hair." He cleared his throat and let out a nervous laugh. "Yeah, I wanted to try something new. Do you not like it? It will always grow back if that's the case." He started rambling. "No. I mean no I like it. You should keep it that way." I said nervously back. "Oh okay. So, are you hungry? I can make something when we get home." I hate how uncomfortable I felt with him. "Yeah, a little bit. A sandwich sounds good." 

        The rest of the ride was awkward and quiet. Neither of us even moved a finger not wanting to push the boundaries of the other. It was a weird feeling not only seeing him but talking to him and being around him. Dr. Robinson was right this was a weird feeling. He pulled into this gated neighborhood near the castle and it was full of mansions, they were all beautiful. It was a light gray with stone covering the sides and driveway. I slowly got out of the car and followed Maxell through the front door. It had gray walls and cream accents. There weren't many decorations but I plan on fixing that at some point. I followed him up the stairs and passed multiple empty rooms and bathrooms. We made it to the double doors and I walked in. The room was beautiful. There was a California king bed in the middle of the room. The comforter and sheets were a light tan and white throw blankets on the bed and on the sitting area near it. Above the bed, there was a picture of Maxwell and I, with a quote underneath it. "I compagni sono un dono della luna. Una rarità che dobbiamo sempre custodire." Maxwell turned to me when I read it out loud. "Did I say it wrong?" I knew I had to work on my Italian but I didn't think I butchered it. "No, you said it perfectly." He smiled and cleared his throat. "Well, you can sleep on the bed and I will sleep on the couch. Did you want to shower or anything?" He asked me.

      "Yeah, I'll just be quick." Maxwell backed away and pointed to which door had the bathroom in it. I walked past him and went into the master bathroom. I jumped into the shower and I made it quick. I put on a pair of sweatpants and a loose Tshirt and walked back in the room. Maxwell had put some sheets onto the couch and was already laying down underneath the blanket. I walked to the bed and slid in under the blanket. I turned the light off and laid there completely still. The bed felt empty and cold. I don't know how long I laid there staring at the ceiling, but I couldn't get to sleep. "Maxwell?" I whispered, trying to see if he was awake. "Yes, are you okay?" He asked me, concern dripping from his voice. "I was just seeing if you were awake." I turned over toward him but he couldn't see me. "I don't sleep much anymore." My heart started beating and the nerves filled me. "If you get in the bed I'm sure it will help. And we just stay on our own sides." He stayed silent not reacting to anything I've said. I heard shuffling and I heard steps walk toward the bed. I felt the blanket lift up and the bed dip on the otherwise. The bed was huge and there was enough space between us.

         It didn't seem enough though. I was still unable to sleep, his scent was distracting me. "Is this as awkward for you as it is for me?" He asked, and I chuckled lightly. "You, know I am sorry for almost killing you a month ago," I said as I moved closer to the middle of the bed. "I deserve it. What I did was awful, and I am disgusted with myself. You deserved better, the world. And I am sorry I didn't give that to you. I'm so, so sorry." I felt him move closer to the middle of the bed too. "We made a lot of mistakes, we couldn't make this easy could we?" I laughed lightly and ran my fingers through my hair. "I just want to start over if that's okay? I know it might be hard because these past few months we have been apart for so long. I want to try and be better" I could feel the sincerity coming from him, and there's nothing more in this life that I'd want. "Slow?" I said to him. "Slow." 

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