Anesthetized Woman. (Burnt Skies Series #1)

2

I decided to walk instead of riding a taxi papuntang bahay. I just wanted to think. I want a time to think all by myself without anyone around me. I wanna figure out why did i smiled at them instead of bursting myself out. I wanna know why i didn't cry when i saw what fucking happened.

I changed the direction of my path, i decided to take the long road to take some time. As I walked I heard someone following me. I did not panic because I knew the man who had followed me earlier. It's Trevin, i think he's 6 feet away from me.
He's a mean guy but i think he's following me for my safety. Yup, he's a gentleman himself i guess. I stopped walking. I heard that he stopped too.

"You can shout it out, alam kong maarte ka kaya I'll pretend na hindi kita naririnig " he said pero nakatalikod paren ako sa kaniya.

"Fuck off." I lazily said to him, not wanting to start a conversation.

"Then don't speak, just let me follow you until you got home safe. It's fucking 11pm Zahra." he said with a deep voice.

I keep silent. I don't wanna hear another word from him. Trevin is a billionaire's son, kaya hindi na ko magtataka kung bakit ganto ugali neto. I know na hindi magandang tarayan ko siya dahil heto lang naman siya binabantayan ako hanggang sa makauwi ng ligtas. Kanina ko pa pinipigilan ang mga salita sa isip ko pero hindi ko na kaya.

"You know what,  for a moment, my entire hopes dissolved in front of me and no matter how much I wanted to pick them up piece by piece, I knew I lost all my strengths. I lost the courage to risk again, i thought he's part of my fucking future. " I said while smiling in pain.

"Sinasabi ko to ngayon dahil alam kong wala kang pakialam. Gusto ko lang pakinggan mo mga salitang tumatakbo sa isip ko sa mga oras na to... sa tingin mo makakapasok pa ko ng may ngiti tulad ng dati? " I asked him, not expecting an answer.

"Wala akong pake at sa tingin ko kailangan mo ng umuwi." Trevin answered.

I faced him with disbelief in my eyes. I saw both of his hands inside his pockets. Really? kailangan ba talagang ganon ang sagot niya habang malungkot ako.

"Seriously Trevin?  Isa ka sa mga taong hindi na dapat kinakausap, dahil sa ugali mo, bakit alam mo bang gwapo ka kaya ganyan ka makaasta ha!? You're this kind of man na badboy in&out !! I'm sorry ha pero I never asked you to follow me until i got home pero get lost. I don't need someone who's not going to listen up seriously." I said out of hand while tearing up.

I know it isn't good pero i guess he'll understand me. I started running home ,i don't wanna hear another word from him again. I got home safely ,changed my clothes and jump in bed to fall asleep.
I'm actually confused, why am i not crying?
I am hurt,  i know that but why i am not crying. I can feel them, the hurt, the sound of a heartbreak, the sad melody, i can feel them even tho I'm not crying.

- It's been 3 weeks since i saw those two fucking snakes, it's still bothering me. It's already 2 o'clock in the morning and all i did was think of that scene in my mind. Does their parents know na nagsesex na sila? I mean for fuck sake we're just in grade 12. To avoid those scenes running on my head i tried to open my twitter for a minute.
I saw the notification bar telling me that i have a message request sa twitter ko. I opened it. I'm shocked when i saw the username.

@treverdejo5 : so

@treverdejo5 : how's your life?

@zahra_lcsn : good, yours?

I lied. There's nothing good. I'm not fine. I'm so sad to the point that I'm disappointed by myself. Fuck you Harvey.

@treverdejo5 : same, we're both lyin aren't we haha

I did not reply to him because I was visited with my drowsiness.

"Thank you lord for making him talked to me. For i believe because of him i can sleep peacefully." I prayed.

-Monday and I'm going to school na,  hindi ko na inantay si Primrose because she told me last night na out of town silang family papunta sa lola nya.

I reached school and i heard the whispers behind me. I guess the rumor got spread because obviously it's a party so hindi lang kami ang magkakasama noon.

"That's her right?" girl said.

"Yup, inagaw nya si Harvey kay Hera sabi ng mga classnates nya. Hahaha pity her inggit na inggit siguro kay Hera" one replied.

"For me super ganda ni Zahra pero hindi naman nya kailangan mang ahas ng ibang jowa para magkaboyfie." girl said.

I stopped walking and faced them with my cold stares.

"I'll not say na those rumors aren't true or not dahil hindi ko na kasalanan kung ganyan kakitid utak nyo" I said while my hands we're inside my pockets. Before pa ko mairita sa kanila, I leave them hanging.

It's wash day today so I'm wearing a highwaist denim skirt tucked in red polo shirt  partnered with white sneakers. Nakataas ang buhok ko dahil mainit.
Pagkapasok sa room ,napatingin halos lahat sakin with disgust sa mga mukha nila.

"Grabe lakas din ng loob na pumasok" Carl said. A gay classmate of mine.

Akala ko mga kaibigan ko ang iba ditu sakanila hindi ko akalaing pati sila maniniwala sa mga pinagsasabi ni Hera.
Huli ko ng nalaman na alam pala nilang lahat na si Hera at Harvey ay gumagawa ng kababalaghan habang ako bulag sa katotohanan dahil sa mga ngiti nila, narealize na isa sila sa tumulong kay Hera at Harvey para pagtakpan ang kawalanghiyaan nilang dalawa. I'm dissapointed , i ignored everyone hanggang sa mag-uwian. It's so hard talaga pag absent si Prim.

I got home safe and greeted my family with a warm smile. I used it so i can hide the pain in my eyes. Everyone lied to me except my beloved family. I'm so blessed to have them. They also know what happened between me and Harvey. Like me, they stay calm.

"Atleast hindi ka na mahirapang maglambing sa haliparot mong ex-boyfriend, kala mo naman gwapo, e mas gwapo pa si Kuya Trevin sakaniya" Astria said jokingly in front of Papa.

"So while we're chatting here,  i want y'all to know na need natin magstay sa Australia for Lola and Lolo, okay? also we can manage our business their, and since katapusan na din nmn ng school year nyo doon na kayo mag-aral ,okay my darlings? " Papa said with a smile on his face.

We both said yes. I'm actually excited because i heard education there is really good specially me who wants to be a doctor. After our small family chats. I decided to go to bed early because I'm so exhausted , nakadisplay ba naman mga mukha ng nga walang kwenta kong kaklase sa buong araw hays.

It's already 8 o'clock in the morning and we're rushing dahil malelate kami sa flight namin to Australia. I don't know but i got the feeling na need kong magthank you kay Trevin so i messaged him through dm

@zahra_lcsn :  thnx for bearing with me kahit we're not friends.

While tying up my hair , i got a reply from him 3 mins ago.

@treverdejo5 : I'm busy with my hoes so stop messaging me , kung satingin mo i care about you, well I'm not.

What a fucking son of a bitch.

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credits to Mica Meñez  ,your words really gave me some inspiration! ♡

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