The Forgotten Ones

Guilt

Song: &Burn by Billie Eilish 

Even though I haven't talked to Willa in a few days now, she still crosses my mind. Even though our "outing" didn't go so well, I know that she will eventually remember. Thinking everything, it does make me sad and disappointed with how life has turned out. Even though I have such a large company and I can have any materialistic thing but I can't have Willa and I know that is my fault. I drove her away from me and none of this would be happening if I just kept my pants on.

Living in my world, I am judged by everything I do. When I married Willa all those years ago, the media was shocked that I would marry someone lower than me and someone who wasn't so materialistic like the other girls I have dated in the past. Meeting Willa on that sunny day changed my life in such a drastic way. She made me change my view of the world and how her society is like. But when it comes to my work, people talk. And there was this pressure of being with someone like me who could understand the type of world I live in. It was difficult for me to do what I did to Willa. I was just put under so much pressure but that is still no excuse for my actions. Willa would always make my day so much better and she understood my work life and never got angry at me whenever I was late coming home or had to work on days, I was off.

We were committed to each other and those years I spent with Willa were the happiest until I started the affair. Seeing those eyes when I told her I didn't love her; it did pain me. Being drunk just made it easier to ignore. I just wish I didn't feel so pressured to fit into the world I live in. I would have Willa. I would have...the baby. Just thinking about the baby that I would've had with Willa breaks my heart. I never wanted for her to go through all of that pain. If I had just known about the baby, I wouldn't have done the things I have done. I would've taken care of her and the baby. I would do anything to have her back and have that baby.

I just wonder if Willa ever knew the gender of the baby.

My dad always wanted me to have a boy for obvious reasons. Willa would talk to me about how much she wanted a boy also because she just wanted another version of me. But thinking about it now, I would never want to have another version of me. Someone else to hurt another the way I did.

A knock on my office door broke me out of my thoughts, my PA walking in a clipboard in hand. "Mr. Campbell, you have a meeting with Mr. White today. He is here in the waiting room. Would you like to meet with him now?" I nodded and then she left to get Mr. White. I haven't spoken to Ethan in a long time. Last time I saw him was at the wedding rehearsal. I could assume that he knew Willa before she and I ever met because I remember standing there, both of them talking. It was like she had known him forever. She was after all, willing to tell him everything that happened to her.

The meeting with him is all strictly about business but I also have to know what all of that is all about. What was their past? Did they ever date? Did anything happen between them? The curiosity was killing me. But I know I can't force the information out of him. He will just have to tell me when he is ready. The only problem is that he knows. He knows what happened between Willa and I. I don't think he will be telling me a whole lot.

The door opens, making my eyes snap and my body straightens. My PA opens the door, Ethan right behind her. "Thank you. It's nice seeing you again, Ethan." I say, standing up to shake his hand. The PA leaves, leaving Ethan and I alone in my office.

"It's nice seeing you again also, Mr. Campbell," Ethan says, his voice low yet firm. After we shook hands, we sat down, my hands resting on my desk.

"How is the business doing, Ethan? Everything good. I do have to make sure that everything on your end is good. Now that we are partners, I want to make sure the stock of my business and the money I am providing isn't going to waste."