Nah, She Didn't

~ Part 78 ~ Well Done To Us! ~

Paint It Black - The Rolling Stones

-James POV-

Did you know that people sweat really bad when they're nervous?

Well, I guess I'd never really experienced
true nerves before now, because before now, I had never sweat like the Niagara Falls while just SITTING ON MY BED.

And so, I'll bring you to my current situation. As of now I am, as I may have mentioned vaguely before, sitting on my bed and sweating like the Niagara Falls.

It was about 6:30, half an hour before the Christmas Ball, and do you know what I was in? I was still in my golden snitch PJ pants and Chudley Cannons t-shirt.

Remus and Sirius, on the contrary, were both all fancied up already, right now standing in front of me and talking to me. Don't exactly know what they're saying, though, as I'm thinking. And you can't think and listen at the same time, duh.

Remus had a white shirt (that type of shirt that goes under a sports jacket-what are those called again?) under a sleek gray sports jacket, no tie, with matching gray pants. Or would they be called sports pants...

Sirius was wearing that same white shirt as Remus with black (sports?) pants and a black belt and no tie. He was keepin' it simple. I mean, he had literally said "Keep It Simple, Stupid, am I right?"

See, Dumbledore had told all the guys to dress up Muggle-fancy instead of Wizard-fancy. And boy am I glad; those dress robes are awful with a capital A.

"JAMES!" I hear someone shout. "Are you even listening to us?!"

I blink, and my eyes focus on the two Marauders in front of me.

"Why hello, my fellow Marauders!" I chirp. "Hey Sirius did you know that your name literally means dog? Sirius means dog. And then your last name is Black, so your name is literally Dog Black. And guess what your Animagus is? A Black Dog! How cool is-"

Remus groans and drags his hand down his face. "He's not even listening to us."

"Huh?" I say.

"Yes, James. We were talking to you," Remus says in the type of voice you'd use with a child.
I see Sirius just laughing in the background.

I sigh. "Look at me!" I exclaim. I indicate how practically my whole shirt is soaked with sweat. "How am I gonna be able to get all dressed up when I am a human water hose?"

Remus waves just hand in the air as if saying no big deal. "Psh! As if I don't know a spell that can fix that. All I need you to do is get off that damned bed, and get dressed!"

"Wait, seriously? You know a spell that can stop me sweating? And you've just let me sit here in my sorrows for the past hour?" I ask.

"Well, we thought you were just being a nervous little shit," Sirius points out. "Communication is very important, Prongs."

"Well, I'm sweating because I am nervous!" I exclaim.

"Why? You've been dating her for what, 2, 3 months now?" Sirius asks.

"One month, 2 weeks, 3 days," I mutter.

"We don't have time for this!" Remus exclaims. "I'm going to set the non-sweat spell on you, you're going to put on your outfit, and then we are going to be on time to the dance!"

"Okay, Moony, then cast the spell on me," I say dramatically. I squint one eye as he raises his wand.

"Impervius," Remus clearly states. I feel the water just sort of... being soaked up off of me. "There. That should keep the sweat off of you... I think."

I let out a big sigh.

"Hurry!" Sirius exclaims. "Get dressed!"

"What?" I practically shout. "Oh! Right!"

I shoot up off the bed, and tug my shirt off over my head. Hey that rhymes... FOCUS!

"Where's my shirt?!" I ask frantically. Remus hands it to me with a raised eyebrow. "Merlin what would I do-"

"Without us, now go," Remus finishes.

I put my arms into the white dress shirt-THAT's what it's called, now I remember!-and hurriedly button it up.

I pause. "Pants?"

Sirius provides me with pants.

I tug off my pajama pants, and pull the dress pants or sports pants or whatever the bloody hell they are over my trunks.

I pause yet again. "Um... tie?"

With a heavy sigh, Remus hands me a black tie.

I bite my lip. "How do I tie a tie again?"

"Ooh Ooh!" Sirius exclaims. "I got this."

He walks forward, grabs my tie, and wraps it around my neck. He does some knot thing that I have no idea whatsoever how he did it, and steps back to admire his work. I look down and see the black tie perfectly tied around my neck.

"Wow, Pads, that's actually... brilliant," I conclude. He dramatically bows.

"Well Moons... how'd we do?" Sirius asks.

Remus checks his watch. "6:49, mates," he says with a surprised yet satisfied expression. "11 minutes to spare."

"Well done to us!"

~ ~ ~
NOTES: X

-Amelia