The Month Of May

Chapter 18

ARMIN HAD A WEIRD LOOK IN HIS EYES WHILE WE TRAINED.

I wasn't sure what he was thinking about, and that worried me. Did he somehow know about what I had done? Armin had been nice to me, I would hate to have to...disarm him. That wasn't really something I wanted to do at all.

Which was strange.

All my life, I'd never had any personal attachments to anyone except for maybe my father, but even then, it was mostly because I'd grown up with him. I just wanted to do what I could to please him because it meant I didn't have trouble. No intense trainings, no beatings...just peace.

That was what I wanted.

"Promise me you'll come home safe," He had said as he clung to me like a vice. I had just stared, wide eyed. It had been the most affection he'd ever shown me. "I haven't treated you the best...but when you come back, we can change that. Just come home. Please."

Hearing him so worried had been a little unnerving, even for me. But...I was excited, I had to admit. This was the main reason I knew I needed to be successful. I had to see my father again...

Well, and saving everyone was also a plus.

"Annie? Are you alright?" Armin questioned, a concerned expression on his features. I shook my head.

"Yes, I'm fine," I nodded, and I extended my arm out towards him to help him off of the ground. He had had a nasty fall after some misuse of the Omni-Directional Movement Gear.

As his hand touched mine, I realized just how warm his hands were. I had briefly held his hand to stabilize him when we'd first started training, and I hadn't taken notice. Once he'd gotten the hang of it, I'd let him go off alone, and he'd been doing fine until this tumble right here. I hadn't thought anything about it before, but my hands were freezing against his.

"You're so warm," I noted. He just shrugged as I helped him up.

"No, you're just cold," Armin laughed, squeezing my hand once before letting go. Instantly, I felt somehow even more cold than before. Was this how I usually was? I had never noticed before, but...

Well, it was probably because of my status. Armin was...well, normal. A normal human being. Of course he would have a normal temperament, although I honestly hadn't noticed my own frigid state until I'd touched him. I liked his warmth.

I wanted more.

But I knew better. I wasn't some girl who had the luxury of clinging to a boy for warmth. I was a girl on a mission. There was no time to think about my own problems and cold. There was no time to long to be a normal human.

Not when everyone's lives were on the line.

"Annie, you alright?" Armin snapped me out of my reverie, and I just nodded. I had gotten too ahead of myself... I had to stay focused on the present, and not getting kicked out of the military before ai could accomplish my goal. Shadis didn't like it when we weren't in the air, so I prepared to take off when Armin interrupted me once more.

"You've been zoning out a lot today..." Armin frowned, a worried expression on his face. "Are you alright?"

Aw. He was worried about me. Sweet. Too bad I couldn't enjoy that.

"Yes. I've just been thinking," I said distantly. I could tell he was disappointed by my answer, so I hastily tried to fumble for a better excuse. "...I've been worried about...Officer Nile's death."

I mean, I wasn't lying. I just wasn't worried in the way he thought.

"Oh, Annie..." He didn't know what to say. I knew he wanted to say it was okay, but we both knew that wasn't accurate at all. "...We're trying to fight it as best as we can."

That was what I was worried about.

"...I know. That's why we have to make sure you're keeping up on your training," Was all I said. "So, come on. Let's get in the air."

"Okay."

We spent the rest of the day together, and even though I knew I shouldn't have, I helped him with maneuvering and getting the hang of it. His fighting skills weren't anything I could really do anything about, but he wouldn't need it anyway. If he could
maneuver, he would pass, I was sure.

I hoped I wasn't spelling out our mission's destruction...but it was only one boy. What could one boy change?