Indecision is Hurtful

Chapter Nine

   Hawkmoth sighed, shifting to sit beside her.

   "You do."

   "And?"

   "And this happened. I— It isn't your fault for forgetting. What I'm trying to say is... You... You have been de—"

   "Master be careful of what you say! Don't push too far!"

   "Why?" He responded telepathically.

   "I'll tell you later. But for now, don't pressure her on anything about what happened, okay?"

   "Hawkmoth? I have been what?"

   Hawkmoth snapped out of his daze and turned to the woman beside him.

   "It's nothing. Tell me how you... feel."

   "What?!"

   "I can sense your confusion. Please enlighten me."

   Nathalie avoided his gaze as her hands gripped the blanket. She furrowed her brows and pursed her lips, a whirlwind of emotions flooding her systems, drowning her with despair she never knew she felt.

   "Nathalie, please look at me."

   No. She won't.

   "Nathalie?"

   No. No. She just won't.

   "Nathalie please..."

   Why can't she do such a simple thing?

   "Na—"

   "I can't look at you because it will worsen goddammit!"

   Her outburst stunned Hawkmoth to silence as she lowered her head and unknowingly did her signature lip purse along with those droopy eyes. She rubbed her arm and continued looking off to the side. She let the silence give her the opportunity to contemplate why this villain right here is acting strange. First, he enters her apartment, Then Lets her punch and kick him and... And he even took care of her when she passed out. God he even changed her into comfortable clothing.

   Still. A familiar feeling swirls in her chest uncontrollably everytime she does so much as look into his eyes. She just couldn't look at him or else a bunch of questionable feelings will overwhelm her and might cause her to break down.

   Hawkmoth placed a hand on her cheek and led her gaze to meet his own. Her face didn't resist but her eyes still looked away. Aversion due to uncertainty.

   "My dearest Nathalie," her eyes widened at that causing her to look at him, making her vulnerable to meet his eyes.

   Why does her heart drop at this? Why do her cheeks burn? Why do her tears want to fall? Why... Why can't she breathe?

   Her breathing quickened as she felt herself trying very hard to hold back her tears. She attempted to catch her breath, her mouth ajar at every gasp causing Hawkmoth to be entranced in alarm once more. Her eyes were shut and she desperately clenched her teeth. He let go of her face as he watched it drop as her breathing quickened uncontrollably.

   "Na-Nathalie. What's going on?" He asked, worry overflowing as he held her shoulders.

   "Residue, master. Before you ask, I'll explain later. This is normal. Calm her down before she passes out."

   He bit his lip as he thought of how to relax her. Her head must be spinning right now. Without thinking, he grabbed her hands and placed his forehead on hers, shutting his own eyes tightly as his thumbs softly caressed her cold knuckles. He held them tightly and eventually felt her calming down, her breathing slowly returning to normal. He smiled as he felt her hands warming up at his touch.