Ruination

Chapter 11: "In my dreams we do"

RIGEL POV:

Laying back on the bed Clarke had made, spread out and threatening to rip out their spleens because I didn't want to share was what I would consider the best part of my day. I knew many people felt it, but I felt behind, like I was stuck running behind the crowd, trying to catch up like I always had. Anger consumed me because of that. A long time ago I had promised to myself that I would stand behind no one, I would let no one protect me and even if Clarke and Ensis insisted on treating me like a child, I knew in my heart I wasn't one.

"Octavia was so awesome," Madi gushed beside me, pacing as a large grin was spread to her lips.

"She's okay," I shrugged my shoulders.

"Did you ever meet her before Pramfaya?" Madi asked me and I glanced over to her, my head flopping to the side.

"I'm not too sure," I confessed, sitting up and leaning forward as Ensis and Clarke slipped into the tent, looking between us.

"No one can know that Madi is a night blood." Clarke began.

"Obviously," I huffed, tilting my head back to look up at her. "I just thought that was obvious."

"Why can't she know about me?" Madi asked, looking to Clarke worriedly.

"Octavia isn't who I remembered; she isn't the girl in the conclave anymore. We can't stay here either, we're already pushing our luck by being here." She sternly pointed out and I sighed.

"Does that mean you can't tell your little girlfriend?" I asked, grinning over at Ensis who bit back his smile, rolling his eyes.

"You can't," Clarke quickly snapped.

"I trust her," Ensis quickly stated.

"I know you trust her; I know you love her. But she's not one of us, she spent six years up on the ring, you don't know who she is anymore. Which means you don't know if you can trust her, she could tell someone." Clarke exclaimed, making a good point, I didn't want to admit it but none of us were how we remembered. We all needed time we didn't have to get to know each other again.

"And once again Skaikru causes more problems than it solves." I drawled out, smirking between them.

"Didn't you hear?" Ensis asked, leaning forward. "They're Wonkru." He drawled out causing me to snicker. "And if Bellatrix realises how important it is to keep this a secret, she won't say anything."

"But you don't know that." Clarke pointed out, tears pooling in the corners of her eyes as I sighed, standing up and placing my hand on Madi's back, pushing her out of the tent and away from Ensis and Clarke who bickered. We sat down on some boxes near a nearby fire and warmed ourselves up.

"Do you trust Bellatrix?" Madi asked, looking up at me shyly. She still didn't understand the dynamics, hearing bedtime stories about the best versions of these people were different to really knowing them.

"I trust that she loves Ensis," I shared, smiling slightly. "She had ever since I have known her." I pointed out sighing. It had been a very brief and fleeting moment, but that moment had wormed its way into my heart, the memory of Raven Reyes was ingrained in my mine. Skaikru would always be the enemy in my mind, all of these emotional people running around and making things worse, but I had managed to care for Raven despite everything. But I had a family now to look after.

BELLATRIX POV:

Too much time had passed, it had never been clearer until I stood in the torn down ruins of what was once Polis. I strolled through the streets where I'd experienced so much good and so much bad. Nothing could make me forget what had happened to me, not in a million years. The world could change, I could change, but then I'd find myself standing in Polis or at the drop ship, or at mount weather and it was like I was pulled back in time. And it caused me to regress.