Therapy // Minsung

T H I R T Y

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minho drove himself to therapy that afternoon, feeling too embarrassed to face his mother. he spent the rest of his friday locked in his room, getting drowned out by his own, upsetting thoughts.

he now patiently sat in the therapy office, waiting for jisung to be ready. he's been arriving slightly late the last few visits, so he's been able to just walk right in. it's been awhile since he's been this early, but he hardly slept last night to oversleep and miss his appointment anyway.

once minho heard the door open, his guts turned. he made a deal with himself to just keep quiet about his actions yesterday. as long as jisung thinks he's getting better, he'll be able to stop going to therapy all together as soon as possible.

yeosang smiled and waved to minho on his way out, and the other couldn't even get himself to return the smile. yeosang frowned, but left him be.

minho stood up and hesitantly walked into jisung's office, avoiding eye contact. he couldn't get jisung's reaction out of his head if we were to find out about what he had done, and it broke his heart.

why do you care so much about what he thinks?

"hey, how was your week?" jisung asked, sounding positive and cheerful. it only made minho want to curl in a ball and sob even more, for a reason he doesn't even know. it's just hard watching people be happy while you're crying on the inside.

absolute garbage. "it was good. nothing too interesting happened."

jisung raised an eyebrow, and took note on minho's body language. he kept his hands behind his back, eyes glued to the floor, and legs crossed. he seemed uncomfortable, or even nervous.

"how was school, then?" he asked, trying to figure out what could be bugging the other out.

minho thought back to how changbin had yelled at him over the project, and he internally cringed at the thought.

"that was fine too."

lier.

jisung wasn't buying any of it. this wasn't his first day on the job, he knows how to read people and can tell by just their eyes how they're feeling. he's learned to read people like a book over the last few years.

minho, on the other hand, had no idea jisung was suspicious.

minho went to run a hand through his hair, but his sleeve fell down when he brought his hand up. jisung gasped, and minho felt like he was frozen in his spot.

jisung had seen everything. all the fresh markings, and minho's face flush red as he yanked the sleeve back down.

"minho..." jisung spoke, at a loss for words. his suspicion that minho was lying is now confirmed. those cuts are too red to not be new.

"please, don't say anything," minho mumbled, and he had to use all his self control not to break down right there.

jisung sighed, putting his clipboard down and scooting closer to minho in his wheely chair. minho took a breath, becoming nervous.

"let me see," jisung calmly and softly spoke, not trying to intimidate the other. minho looked at him like he was absolutely crazy.

is he for real?

"no," minho answered, voice barley above a whisper. he was embarrassed, nobody has ever seen his scars before. well, besides his mom and a few doctors, but that's beside the point.

jisung grabbed both minho's hands, and stared into his eyes. minho gulped, and swore his heart beat right out of his chest.

"please, minho? i want to help you. i care."

minho blinked in response, not knowing what to say.

he doesn't care, he's lying.

"y-you're lying," he said his thought out loud. jisung only frowned more at the others words.

"no, i really do care."

minho felt like he had no choice, as if he was trapped. he slowly rolled up his sleeve, revealing his abused forearm. minho couldn't even look at jisung's face, afraid to see how disappointed he is. he kept his eyes squeezed shut, trying not to let tears out.

jisung moved minho's sleeve back down, covering up the others humiliation. "there's nothing to be embarrassed about. it's okay."

minho opened his eyes back up, and jisung surprisingly looked understanding. he wasn't disgusted with him or even freaked out. he seemed like he genuinely cared.

"as sad as i am to see you did this to yourself, it's why you're here, right? it's something the two of us are going to work on. we're in this together, okay?"

minho nodded, releasing a breath he didn't know he was holding.

"tell me why you did this." jisung seriously spoke, changing the tone of his voice from soft to more stern.

minho sighed, "i...i felt alone. like i wasn't good enough f-for anyone. i thought i deserved the pain, for being a p-pain to others."

jisung didn't say anything; he just continued to stare into the others eyes.

there's something jisung has yet to tell minho; he knows some little psychology tricks that he's been taught in school. he's learned that if you keep quiet and maintain eye contact, the other will tend to open up more.

at the silence, minho continued speaking, "i know it sounds ridiculous, but doing this to myself makes me feel...i guess, relieved. like if people saw what i was doing, they would be happy i did this."

jisung nodded, though he felt as if his heart just shattered. nobody should have to feel that way.

"i'm s-sorry i couldn't stay strong..."

jisung shook his head, "minho, you are strong. being able to talk about this with me shows just how strong you really are. most people find it insanely hard just to admit they need to help. and i wish you would see yourself the way i do."

minho felt like his heart exploding. hearing someone talk about him in this way made him feel so different, and he really likes it.

he really likes jisung.

~

i cant believe this story is already at thirty chapters! most of my stories i have end around this many, and yet it feels like this story is just getting started. i don't see it ending any time soon, so i hope you are all excited for the rest of it!

i also decided to stop asking questions, simply because i cant come up with any anymore cjskfjs. but thank you to everyone who participated in answering them <33