DESTINY'S PLAN - *HOT NEW BOOK*

Chapter 29

Jason's POV

I studied her as she discreetly exited the room.

To the naked eye she looked fine, politely excusing herself from the room. But I knew Krissy...and with my newfound skill in emotions, I could tell when someone was bullshiting... and she was.

She seemed anxious, like she was on the verge of something, but I couldn't tell what.

I watched her until her perfect body exited the room. And let my eyes rest on the door as I thought about her.
I wonder what's wrong with her.

Well I guess it's me.

I guess she's shocked to see me. No, I guess she's disappointed, disgusted.
Yeah, I guess she's so disgusted that she can't physically be in the same room as me that she had no option but to walk out on me.

She walked out on me...

My mind immediately shot back to the last time I saw her. On her 18th birthday, the first time she walked out.

The memory caused a feeling to bubble deep inside of me as the scene of her back towards me, walking out of the room, played on loop in my head.
The feeling bubbled until it housed itself in the pit of my chest.

The feeling was anger.
My gaze suddenly hardened as I leaned into the feeling, now glaring at the door she exited from.

I was angry.

I was angry at the first time she walked out and left me. I was angry she didn't stick it through, I was angry that she left me worst than I was when I met her. I was angry that I went psychotic the year after she walked out, I was angry it took me so long to get back on my feet and I am so fucking angry that FOUR fucking years later I am not fully over her!

And I hated myself for that...weakness that I couldn't fully strengthen.
For four years I dealt with shit and she was doing... what?

My eyes still resting on the door she walked out of, I struggled to think back to the early days when I had her followed and had weekly reports sent to me about what she was up to.
But I can no longer remember the contents of those reports. They went away along with the suppressed memories of her.

So, what had she been doing all these four years?

Was she happy?

I hope she was.
Well she's here at my father's company with a post graduate internship, so I guess she is. She's at least doing well, very well to be partnering up with K&G, as they only take the best of the best graduates. But I knew better than anyone that success doesn't automatically equate to happiness.

So, was she happy... without me?

I could feel a fixation on her happiness begin to form. And with my new set of skills I could identify why the fixation was forming.

I did want her to be happy however, in a fucked up way I would be jealous if she was. Cause that would mean I was easy to get over, that she found happiness in things other than me, or that she simply was stronger than me in dealing with pain.
It didn't matter what the reason, all I could conclude was that if she was happy apart of me would be jealous.

Krissy wasn't particularly strong, she had a fire in her, no doubt, but she clearly expressed insecurities. Big ones, mine might have been slightly bigger but only slightly. Looking back I think we took comfort in knowing that the other wasn't perfect, we weren't stereotypically strong. I think where her strength showed was how she overtly vocalised her flaws with me, which I was painfully uncomfortable with doing back then.

So there's another part of me, a shameful part! That wanted her to hurt like I have. Knowing that would make me feel connected to her, to know we felt the same, stayed together though apart.