I returned to the cafe because yes, Courtney was right, I did love Emmy. It was different now, though, and I couldn't lie and say that my heart hadn't been broken by the fact that Courtney had walked away from me so quickly, without giving me a real chance to talk to her about all of this.
However, with that being said, I did love Emmy. She was my best friend and would always be my best friend and the two of us needed to talk about this. We needed to talk about all of this.
"Are you joking me, Clarke?" Emmy asked me.
"What?" I asked her, as I walked over to sit beside her at the table.
I was fairly sure the cafe was going to close soon, but Lois wasn't exactly about to kick the two of us out. She didn't look too angry with me, now, either, which was a relief.
"You love me?" she asked me.
"I did. I mean, I do. As a friend, though but...I can't lie and say that at one point it wasn't more than that, Emmy. I valued our friendship too much though to say something that could potentially destroy all of that. Now, though, I realise that I have colossally messed up," I stated.
"You have colossally messed up. All of this hurt could have been prevented if you had just been honest with me. I love you too, Phoebs, I always will but...I'm with Lois now and you're with Courtney and-"
"I'm not so sure about that. I don't think Courtney wants to talk to me right now, if ever again. She said that she was going to go and get her father's motorcycle and leave town," I stated.
Lois walked over to our table and gave a slight shake of her head.
"No, she's not. She's not going to just up and leave like that. Let's think about this, Phoebe. Courtney cares about you. She cares about you more than I have ever seen her care about anyone. More than I ever saw her care about me. Now, I'm no expert but a mere look at the girl tells me everything I need to know," Lois said. "I'm not going to give you a lecture because I don't think that you deserve that right now but you do, however, need to be careful what you say. Courtney has been through a lot. She doesn't give people second chances often. That being said, if you tried to tell her and prove to her that she can trust you, then you might be alright," Lois said.
I swallowed, as I felt my eyebrows crinkle together slightly. My heart hurt so much.
"I haven't been very kind to you, Lois. I really am glad that Emmy has someone like you. I supposed I was jealous, before, but I'm eighteen. It's time for me to start growing up. If there is anything at all that I can ever do for you, please let me know. I'm here," I said and then looked towards Emmy again with a warm expression upon my face, "For the both of you."
Of course, I was always going to be there for Courtney, too. I was sensitive to the fact that she had been through a lot and as much as she may have denied that she needed me, I knew that in truth she really did. She wouldn't have even said that she did, if she didn't. I just wasn't sure what to say to her, anymore. I watched as she walked away and I felt stricken in the worry that there wasn't a word I could say that would bring her back to me.
"Courtney may act all tough but she'll be back at school tomorrow. I can already guarantee that," Lois said. Her expression became more serious before she spoke again, "Don't give up on her, Phoebe," she told me.
I couldn't. I wouldn't.
Above all else, Courtney was my friend and I had vowed to myself that I would be there for her. "You're a good friend, Phoebe. That's why I'm helping you out, so...don't make me regret it. Talk to Courtney tomorrow, alright? Sort something out with her," Lois said.
I had a feeling that 'sorting something out' was easier said than done. However, I couldn't allow that to stop me.
"It's going to be alright," Lois added, with a kind smile.
"It's not practical for all of us to be sat here simply talking about this. Let's get out of here," Emmy said.
I nodded in agreement and by the time we were out of the cafe, Emmy's eyes were on me again.
"I'll drive you home. Lois, I'll see you tomorrow, alright?" Emmy asked her.
"Of course," Lois said, as she released a breath and smiled at the pair of us.
I had a feeling that Lois probably wasn't quite as jealous as Courtney could be. She probably wasn't as jealous about Emmy and I, as I had been about her and Emmy. Looking back on that, I felt so ridiculous. I had liked Emmy so much but that had never really warranted me to be such a jealous best friend. I lost sight of what had truly been important.
"See you around, Lois," I replied.
Lois nodded.
Emmy and I walked over to her car and sat down within it.
Emmy didn't start up the engine immediately, though. She turned to me and sighed.
"It's okay," she said calmly, although I could tell by the glint in her eyes that she was a little anxious about the whole thing.
"I didn't ever want to ruin our friendship, Emmy. I care about you and I want what is best for you. I have always only wanted what is best for you. You have to believe me, when I say that," I said. Emmy started up the engine.
"I know. I believe you, Phoebe," she said kindly, "I love you. I always will. Not in the way that you used to love me but...you're my best friend. Nobody could ever change that fact. Now, let's get out of here, alright? I'll get you back home and by tomorrow, everything will be alright again. We will get Courtney to speak to you again. I promise."
After she had said all that, I managed to settle back into the seat of Emmy's car a little better and simply watched the coloured lights, as Emmy drove us on.
YOU ARE READING
Leather Jacket Girl (girlxgirl)
أدب المراهقينFinally out and proud in her final year of college, Phoebe Clarke finds herself ready to try to find a girlfriend. She isn't sure where to begin but she is glad to have the support of her best friend Emmy Rose to support her. While Phoebe continues...