Addicted z.m

Epilogue

Zayn's POV

It was past two in the morning and I was still awake. She had fallen asleep quite a few hours ago.

We never left the bed. We didn't dare move from our spots because we knew that would make the goodbye real... and official.

She began stirring in her sleep where she lay curled up into my side, her head on my chest.

"Zayn," she whimpered. She continued to repeat my name in her sleep, each time growing more and more frantic and panicked.

"Spencer?" I lifted my head to look at her. She clenched her hand into a fist and creases formed between her eyebrows as she continued to say my name. "Spencer, wake up babe." I began shaking her lightly. "Spencer-"

She gasped and lifted up off of me, stunned. Her eyes were filled with panic and her hair was moist with sweat.

"Spencer," I whispered, stroking her cheek. "What's wrong?"

"Zayn?" she questioned my presence. She stroked her hand up my chest, my neck, and my cheek. "Oh thank God!" she cried before wrapping her arms around me and crying.

"Love, what is wrong?" I held her tight.

She continued to cry without answering. I just held onto her and waited for her sobs to fade into sniffles. When that finally happened, she loosened her grip around my neck and pressed her ear against my bare chest.

I took a deep breath, rubbing her arm with my thumb on her arm and planted a kiss on her matted hair.

"You wanna talk about it?" I asked.

She ran her hand up and down my chest then took a shakey breath. "For the past few months, all my dreams have been memories. Some nights good..." She traced the tattoos on the left side my chest so tenderly, goosebumps rose on my skin. "Most nights...haunting."

I traced her jaw, then down her spine, and back up to trace down her arm. I clutched onto the hand that rested on my chest.

"You were dead, Zayn," she raised her voice just an octive. "I watched Michael shoot you but you didn't wake up. You were dead. It was so real. I couldn't-" she paused then pulled her hand out of my mine to cover her face. "I couldn't live with the thought of you gone too. I couldn't. I just- I can't!"

"Shh," I ran my hand through her hair and squeezed her tighter. "I'm not going anywhere."

She lifted her head to look at me. "Don't make promises you can't keep," she begged.

"I'll be here as long as you desire," I corrected. She stared at me with hope in her eyes, as if the notion was possible. "Let's go back to sleep."

"No," she snapped. "I don't want to sleep."

"Babe-"

"No!" she protested. "I said I don't want to..."

My fingers brushed her clammy skin. "Okay," I whispered. "It's okay. You don't have to sleep. Okay?..."

She hesitated but rested her head on my chest, underneath my chin.

"What can I do?" I asked.

"Talk to me about something happy," she requested.

I thought for a moment in the silence before speaking.

"The Horans seem to have taken you in."

Her arm snaked around my torso from where it had lain on my chest. "A couple months before we left, Maura came to London with her sister and one of Niall's cousins. She introduced me as Niall's long lost twin that got put up for adoption by mistake. The story within the family is that it was lucky Niall was the first one I ran into on my first day of school here.