The others

Sleepless

Joe laid there awake. His heart seemingly thumping harder and faster in his ears as he rested his head upon the usually comfortable cloud of his pillow. The soft sounds of gentle snores coming from his right seeming to only keep him awake further as the cold October night drew on.

It had been a long week for Joe. A long, confusing week which seemed to drag on for years.

At first his heart had been full of hope. He had a new dance, a new thing to focus his mind on, and all he needed to do was wait for a particular redhead to give a simple answer to a basic question. However, as the week drew on and Mondays turned into Tuesdays, Joe soon found himself becoming nothing but confused. With the redhead in question seeming to stomp on his heart only to kiss him the following afternoon, the feel of her lips on his seeming to be imprinted onto his mind whenever he looked at her, and furthermore the subtle kisses she had continued to place on him in the most unexpected of moments throughout the following days with no explanation, seeming to do nothing more than blur the already wobbly lines which the two of them had drawn in - what was meant to be - a professional relationship. The lines which only seemed to appear on a Saturday night in front of a live audience, some cameras, and the entire nation watching from the comfort of their armchairs at home.

There was a part of him which enjoyed it, of course there was. After all, this game of cat and mouse they were seemingly playing was nothing but exciting. And he would be a fool not to enjoy the attention and kisses he gained from a gloriously attractive young woman. Not to mention that the secret kiss she had given them before the Saturday night had undoubtedly boosted his confidence, allowing him to pull of an American Smooth without a hitch, almost.

But now it was 3 am on a Tuesday morning. The lyrics to just got paid where fuzzing through his mind like a broken record, and the excitement of the kiss that the redhead had given him as he left the studio that evening had been all but forgotten. And instead, left in its wake, was a heap of guilt - confusion - bitterness - and loneliness which filled the busy mind of the young brunette.

Turning his head to the right, Joe took in the sleeping form of the young woman next to him. Her arms tucked neatly under the cover which was pulled tightly up to her chin. Whilst small, almost adorably soft snores escaped the threshold of her partially parted lips. Her petite body curled up on the far side of the bed from him. Something which Joe was almost certain never used to happen before; when instead previously Holly would have wanted nothing more than to practically cling onto Joe all night. His pillow becoming their pillow - his warmth becoming their warmth. But now they had been separated, split apart by a stupid decision that he had made, and the poor girl didn't even know it yet.

Audibly sighing, Joe ran a hand through the mess of his hair, his fingers coinciding with the knots he had been too tired to even brush out last night. Before slowly clambering out of the warmth of his duvet cover, the cold air of the early winter night hitting his bare chest, resulting in the brunette wrapping the softness of a dressing gown around his body. The warmth and cosiness of the flannel-like material instantly seeming to make himself feel that little bit sleepier than he was before, yet not enough to make the idea of clambering back into bed with one of the women on his mind seem any more inviting.

Wondering down the dimly lit steps of his beloved London home Joe allowed his brain to wonder down the path he had been prohibiting it from doing all week. And in fact down the path he had struggled with all his life. He allowed himself to feel - allowed himself to divulge into the way he was truly feeling without the need of guilt or of judgement to pass through him at the early hour.

Pouring himself a glass of chilled water, before settling down on the rickety old bar stools lent up against the kitchen island Joe placed his head in his hands. His mind swirling in every direction possible as he took the time to truly digest everything that had happened over the past ten or so days. His tired, aching brain seeming to do nothing but struggle helplessly along with his tired and aching body, until a distraction seemed to take his mind elsewhere.