One House Behind | ✓

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐬

Tanner

I didn't know if Shelly was being quiet or was put off by my little act. I didn't want to ask her either. If I did, then I knew she was going to say yes and I would recoil from her. I was just getting used to having someone genuinely be there for me that I didn't know how to explain why I got mad.

Susie had been talking about how she wanted to meet Shelly. I didn't want that. It was as if Shelly was my little secret and no one was ever going to see her. Even though I knew she was coming over and my family could see her, she was still my little secret. One only I knew completely.

But Susie had ruined that the moment Shelly had shown up to my house. Her dark brown eyes were a bit on the wide side as she took in the scene of me and my sister arguing.

We sat in silence and I didn't like it. She was fixated on her homework and that was good except that I wanted to talk. Maybe I got too used to the idea of us always talking when the other wanted. The feeling of drifting became apparent and I was drowning in my emotions.

"Shelly?"

"Hmm?" She didn't even look up.

"Uh, um...nevermind."

What was I supposed to say? We weren't good enough friends for me to tell her what happened. Or about Leslie.

Because as much as I'll think of it as nothing, Leslie was something. I was just really good at separating feelings and wants. Really needs but it still holds the same. 

But Shelly didn't need to know about Leslie. There was no reason to bring up an old fling with a friend. That was before, in a distant era of someone I'll never be again. Before the Tanner that Shelly knew. I wanted to be a different Tanner in front of her. I wanted to be better in her presence.

"I'll be back," I huffed as I got up.

"Okay, " her soft voice replied. Timid. Scared. Driving away from me.

Gulping, I left Shelly on the grass and walked to Susie's room. It was her fault. We were fine and then she basically ripped through us.

Whatever us meant. 

Pushing her door open, Susie's eyes widened as the door slammed on the front of her closet. I knew my parents heard and something bad was coming my way.

"What the hell?"

"No, you don't get that line, Susie! What the hell do you think you were doing? There was a reason I wanted you gone before she arrived!"

"I don't have the slightest clue what you are saying."

"Uh-huh."

My phone buzzed multiple times in my pocket but I ignored it. With my eyes locked on Susie, I felt when my parents walked up behind me. I could feel their presence but my glare was set on Susie.

"What's wrong?"

"She's what's wrong! She can't seem to keep her nose out of my business!"

"Tan," Mom's voice was soft as she laid a hand on my shoulder.

"What?" I snapped.

"She didn't mean to. We all know how hard it is for-"

"So you set this up? You made sure that she said something that we all said we wouldn't talk about again. I thought we talked about it, Leslie is history. We moved, it's time we all moved on from what we did!"

I hadn't realized my mistake until it was too late. We had never talked about it because they didn't know about Leslie and me. Susie's once wound-up body relaxed only because I had spilled the beans.

"What happened?"

My phone buzzed repeatedly again but I ignored it. Whoever texted me so much could wait. I was too angry to even try to be calm enough to answer.

"Nothing, "

"Did you do-"

"I didn't do shit! I'm just saying, we should all move on. I'm done with Leslie and I'm done with thinking about her. Yeah, we may have had something but it doesn't matter.

We are in two separate worlds now. We are never going to work that out now." My laugh was harsh.

Susie shook her head at me. Rolling her eyes, her head fell into her right hand as her left pointed to her computer. She was on a video call.

With Leslie.

My phone buzzed one last time. I felt guilt rush into my stomach as I realized what I had done. Groaning, I squeezed my eyes shut tightly as if it could take away what happened just seconds ago.

"I-" I couldn't find anything to say.

I stormed outside to Shelly. She was waiting. It had to have been five or ten minutes. When I stepped onto my porch, I realized two things.

One: the sun had set and the sky was starting to get filled with stars.

Two: Shelly was gone.

I felt dread replacing anger and guilt. But guilt came back just as hard. I walked to the edge of the street to see if she was there. To check if I could at least catch a glimpse and settle out leaving her to herself. But she wasn't there. She was long gone already.

Checking my phone, I realized she was the cause of the buzz. All of them were her.

And I had left her outside for twenty minutes like an asshole and didn't remember her until I got over my fit. Only when I felt the need for her. That was unfair.

So I figured the best thing to do was to leave her be.