Pariah: The Other Malfoy

Chapter 16: Guilt

It was a week later when I woke up. Madam Pomfrey gasped when she saw me sit up, running out of the Hospital Wing instantly. I frowned, groaning in pain as I swung my legs over the edge of the bed. I was alive?

She returned minutes later, Dumbledore, McGonagall and Snape with her.

"Back in bed," she barked at me, causing me to jump, scampering back to bed without hesitation.

"Miss Malfoy, we are very glad to see you are awake," Dumbledore smiled at me, "We weren't sure if Fawkes had reached you in time."

"Wait, the Dark Lord! The diary!" I exclaimed, sitting up again.

"Miss Malfoy, its fine," McGonagall smiled at me, "You and Potter saved the day again. The Basilisk is dead, Miss Weasley is safe and the muggleborns are awake again."

I processed that information for a second before my head dropped.

"I knew," I said quietly, "Not directly, but... I knew about the diary, I saw my father give it to Ginny but I didn't say anything. This is my fault!"

The teachers were silent for a moment, before Dumbledore spoke.

"The only person at fault is Tom Riddle, fifty years ago," he said quietly, "Your father gave the diary, not you. You didn't know what it contained, you couldn't know."

"But I knew it had to be something bad!" I cried out, "Just because I was afraid..."

"Lyra, you are twelve years old," Snape spoke, "Stop trying to carry the weight of the world on your shoulders. Nobody died, the petrified are awake again. It is not your fault."

"Can I... leave?" I asked quietly.

"If Madam Pomfrey allows it," McGonagall told me.

"I don't want you walking anywhere by yourself, and I want you to return here the moment you feel dizzy," I was told sharply, and I nodded quickly.

"Professor Snape, will you take Miss Malfoy to her friends? I believe they are still waiting in the courtyard," Snape nodded, watching as I tenderly put my weight on my legs.

McGonagall and Dumbledore spoke quietly as we left, my pace slow as I tested out the strength in my injured leg. It was stiff and slightly painful, but I covered my limp as best I could in case Pomfrey changed her mind. I really didn't want to spend any longer in the Hospital Wing.

"Lyra," Snape said as he opened the door, "Please don't blame yourself. If you had called out your father for that diary, you would have been hurt and it would have still found its way to Hogwarts."

"But I still feel as though it's my fault!" I sighed, clenching my fists.

"Its not," Snape said sharply, "I know your father can be cruel, and it's his fault you feel this way. But all he considers important is loyalty to family, which clearly isn't always the best way forward."

"Lyra!" A yell cut him off, a body crashed into me.

"Mr Roberts, I would advise being more careful than that," Snape commented.

"Sorry," he laughed awkwardly.

"Tobias! You're okay!" I hugged him tightly, laughing despite myself.

"Good as new," he grinned, hugging me back, "I'm so glad you're okay! Harry was healed instantly, but you've been out for a week. We were all really worried!"

"I'm fine," I smiled at him, before glancing over his shoulder at the other three.

I heard Snape's footsteps receding as they approached, and I took a deep breath.

"I'm sorry," they frowned, "I knew my father had given Ginny the book, but I swear I didn't know what it was. And I was going to tell you, but then things went... well, a bit crazy and it slipped my mind and I'm so so sorry-"

"Hey, Lyra? Be quiet," Ron laughed slightly, "It wasn't your fault. God, without you I doubt we would have stopped it all! Your father is at fault for owning the diary in the first place, nothing you did was wrong. And nobody died, so-"

"Yes, but-"

"Shush! End of story!" Ron interrupted me, "Everyone is fine, the Basilisk is dead, the diary is destroyed. Nobody needs to know anything else."

"Okay," I nodded, "Fine. I won't mention it again."

"Agreed," Hermione smiled, "Lets enjoy the last week at Hogwarts before we have to leave."

I swallowed thickly, forcing a smile. Only one week.

"Oh, uh..." Harry looked awkward, "I should probably warn you..."

Everyone shared glances as Harry paused, I frowned deeply.

"Well, you see, I kinda... tricked your father into freeing Dobby?" Harry said and I grinned.

"Really?" My smile grew wider, "Thank you, Harry. Dobby had an awful life, I have no idea how you know him but... thank you."

"He tried to save my life by stopping me going to Hogwarts, he knew something was going on. He was the reason Ron and I missed the train," Harry said, "You're not annoyed? Won't your father be angry?"

"That's Dobby," I laughed, "My father will be mad anyway, given the whole Chamber of Secrets thing failed. If anything, you couldn't have done it at a better time. I doubt it will even have crossed his mind by the time I get home, he has other things to be angry at me about."

"You sure you don't wanna run away, and stay at mine?" Tobias asked suddenly.

"I appreciate the offer, truly, but my father has the Ministry in his pocket," I sighed, "That would just get your home raided and your parents in trouble. I'll survive six weeks, then I'll see you all again."

"Promise?" Tobias asked.

"I promise," I smiled at him, and he squeezed my hand.

The next week went quicker than I would have liked. My leg was still stiff, I was walking with a slight limp, and I had a scar where the fang went into my leg. Harry had avoided it, but as the phoenix didn't get to me until late, I was stuck with it. I didn't admit it to anyone, but Harry's admission of Dobby's freedom terrified me. I was super happy for him, he deserved it, but I had lied when I said it wouldn't affect my father's mood. I knew it would make things even worse for me, and I didn't know if I could survive six weeks at home.

I put on a mask as I said goodbye to my friends, smiling and laughing right until I turned my back on them. My father and brother were already waiting for me, my brother with a smug grin already on his face.

I discovered why when we got home. He had informed my father of most of the things that had transpired that year in the few minutes I had taken to get over to them, focusing mostly on how I had helped Harry figure out about the Chamber of Secrets.

I was lucky that my only punishment was being locked in my usual place, nothing physical yet. I cried myself to sleep that night, remembering how things were before I was sorted, thinking how much easier my life would have been if I had just been a Slytherin.

But truly I didn't want that. If I had been a Slytherin, I never would have met my friends, never would have realised the views I was raised with were completely wrong. Yet, I still found myself missing the love of my family.

The last thing I expected happened a week later. The door was opened suddenly, footsteps headed down towards me. I instinctively flinched, cowering against the wall, when the footsteps stopped.

"Come upstairs," the silky voice of my father, my eyes widened in fear as I did as I was told.