One More Try

Obstacles

While Reg and Jean were of course very busy with Ophelia and everything that had followed after her accident, Wilf and Cissy also had some issues to deal with. Of course, Wilf's return from Milan had been triumphant, not because there had been so many photographers and fans at the airport, but because for the first time someone had been waiting for him, smiling and waving and hugging Cissy after being separated for such a long time had been one of the happiest moments in his life. Someone had been waiting for him, someone who truly cared. He often thought about that day and all the things they had spoken about. There was something that worried Wilf, something he knew would make things a little complicated. He also knew that he had to tell her, it was just really embarrassing to him. But when a few weeks had passed and Cissy hadn't fallen pregnant, Wilf knew it would be better to explain. There would be no miracle and maybe an early medical intervention would help them be successful in conceiving a child. That evening when Cissy returned from her job, he had already prepared dinner. Currently, Cissy wasn't working at a theatre, instead she'd accepted an offer to fill in for one of her former teachers at her old drama school, as a maternity cover to be exact. The irony of the situation wasn't lost on them, not at all, but Cissy enjoyed teaching and Wilf was just happy to see her happy.
"So, how was school, my love, did they behave?" His eyes twinkled, he would have been one of the naughty students, that was for sure.
"Mostly, dear, but it was a long day. I missed you." These words just slipped out and Cissy accompanied them with a soft kiss on his cheek and a fleeting brush over his hand.
Wilf's face softened immediately, he knew Cissy was trying not to appear clingy because of some misguided belief that he didn't like that, so when she actually admitted to missing him or thinking about him, it meant a great deal.
"I missed you too, in fact, I couldn't stop thinking about you." He kissed her hand. "Sit down, relax, I made dinner, I prepared your vitamins and I even got the grape juice you like so much, so we can toast." He'd thought of everything and honestly, their baby plans were also a great help with his sobriety.
"That sounds wonderful." Cissy placed another soft kiss on his cheek and went to was her hands before putting away her cloak and bag. Wilf almost melted from that small, innocent touch. He was a complete fool for her, that was sure. He'd never loved, no, adored someone the way he adored her. Not even himself and the world knew just how much of an egotistical prick he'd been. His life could be divided in two parts now, "Before Cissy" and "After Cissy". Which one did Wilf prefer? It was obvious.
When Cissy returned, he walked her to the dining room where he'd set the table.
"Wilf, dear, what's this all about? Is something wrong? Are you in trouble?" Cissy saw in his eyes that something was up, she could read him like an open book, which prompted a deep sigh from Wilf.
"I wouldn't describe it as such but... There's something I haven't told you. Please, sit down, it's... It's important." Cissy sat down, her face was suddenly pale and her thoughts were racing. Something he hadn't told her. What could that be?
"Please don't look so worried, my love. It has nothing to do with you. It's just... Gosh, this is embarrassing. But..." He took a deep breath. In the olden days he would have killed at least half a bottle of wine before a conversation like this. But not anymore and he knew it was better to face things than run away or try to cheat himself out of uncomfortable situations.
"Wilf, what is going on, please just tell me, I promise I won't be upset." Cissy was biting her lip, a sure sign that her anxiety was skyrocketing, so Wilf just got right to it.
"Hold that thought, princess. I... When going through theatre school, Reg and I thought it would be a fun way to earn some money by donating to a sperm bank. Well, I thought so, Reg just tagged along." Cissy stared at him. Wilf blushed, he wasn't sure what he was more embarrassed about, his past self's idea of a fun way to earn money or the other thing he was trying to confess.
"So you're trying to tell me that there are probably a few of your kids running around out there?" She didn't quite know how to feel about this but one thing was for sure, it wasn't a positive feeling.
"No." He sighed. "They test you, to know if you are okay to donate and it turned out... That my sperm count is really low." He stared down on the floor. He should have told her sooner but how should a gentleman bring up such a sensitive topic? "It... Means that we will probably need some help conceiving, that is, if you still want to." Now it was Wilf's turn to bite his lip, but relief flooded Cissy's mind. That was all? Thank heavens.
"Of course I do. You should have told me sooner though. This is nothing to be embarrassed about, I'll make an appointment at the clinic first thing tomorrow and then we'll go from there." Cissy kissed his cheek. "Now stop worrying, I'm hungry." With that she ended the topic, at least for the time being, there would be a lot of time to discuss it in the future.
They had dinner together, Wilf's kitchen skills had drastically improved ever since he'd been with her.
"Have you spoken to Reg lately?" Cissy asked after a while. Wilf shook his head.
"I tried calling, but he's busy."
"Same with Jean, I tried to offer some help but she said they were fine. When I went to see Ophelia it felt like Jean and Reg didn't want me there either. Do you think we did something that upset them?" Wilf squeezed his fiancée's hand. Seeing her so worried wasn't easy for him and he had noticed how distant their friends had become.
"I think they are just very focused on Pheli right now, don't you fret my love." His voice usually soothed her, but that day it just missed the mark.
"Hmmm." Cissy couldn't help but worry about what she perceived as hostility, she wasn't sure what had brought it on though and whether it originated from Jean or Reg. She kept thinking about something she could have done to hurt them, but nothing came to mind. Maybe Wilf was right, maybe she should just leave them to it until they felt really to reach out.
The next morning, Cissy arranged an appointment at the hospital before going to work. This mattered to her and she wanted to make sure to take care of everything before Wilf changed his mind about opening up and tackling the issues he had. Of course he was a little embarrassed, she understood where he was coming from and was far from dismissing his feelings, but he couldn't let them stand in the way of their happiness. Asking for help was nothing to be ashamed of. The nurse had been very understanding and accommodating on the phone, she'd had given them an appointment for the same week after Cissy had made clear that they would be paying privately for any procedure they needed, instead of doing it on the NHS.
Everything would be alright. The hospital was the same where Ophelia was being treated and as Cissy loved her goddaughter, she decided to see this as a positive sign. With her heart much lighter and her thoughts slowing down, she went to work, actually looking forward to the distraction.
Meanwhile, Wilf was at home, his new engagement wouldn't start until the next month and so he wasn't really doing anything. He brought some things from his house to Cissy's, he lived with her now and it was all he needed. So much had changed for him, for the better, of course, but it was still a lot. He'd seen his doctor a few days ago, and the doctor had been thrilled with how good his test results were. He did feel better. He slept better. He made healthier choices. For the first time ever since he turned 18 he lived like a man who actually had a future. Cissy was his future.
Later, Wilf tried to reach Reg, they hadn't spoken in a while, but that day he was lucky, or so he thought.
"Paget?" Reg sounded terribly exhausted.
"Hey there, old sport. It's me. How are things? How are you holding up, I haven't heard from you in a while."
"Yeah, and? We're busy here, my daughter was in an accident in case you forgot." Reg hadn't meant to snap like that, but he was sleep deprived, worried and not happy with how slowly Ophelia was making progress. He just wanted his daughter to be happy, instead he saw her grow more and more frustrated because she still couldn't get up.
"I haven't. That's why I'm calling. Listen, we were thinking about visiting Ophelia again soon, when would be a good time?" Wilf tried to remain calm, he knew that Reg was not being himself, so he did his best to be understanding and patient.
"When she's back home, we already don't get enough time on our visits." This answer surprised Wilf, but he didn't let it show. Reg himself didn't know what had prompted it. He and Jean spent almost too much time at the hospital. Maybe it was because he wasn't really himself at the moment, he wouldn't want his oldest friend to see him like this, not because they didn't talk about their feelings, but because he didn't want him to worry. He felt like he and Jean were caught up in a kind of worry and grief that outsiders just didn't get. So why bother Wilf?
"Alright then. Reg, I know that this isn't easy for you. We're friends, no, we're like brothers and I'm here for you, so if you ever want to talk, or see me or need anything, please call me. You know where I am." There was a kind of sincerity in Wilf's voice that Reg didn't hear often.
"Sure. See you." The line went dead and Wilf sighed. Why didn't he want his help?