Azula's Recovery - Avatar: TLA

2.3 - Ursa

Ursa had barely touched her tea as she sat, hardly listening to the others' conversation. She was too busy thinking of Azula, her memories of the beautiful little girl chasing Zuko and doing cartwheels through the garden.

Ursa thought back even further, to holding her as a baby. Azula had been so small, so cute, so quiet. Zuko had been fascinated with his new baby sister and always wanted to see her. As she grew up he would play with her constantly, sharing all of his toys and teaching her fun games to play.

She remembered the day that little Azula realized she could firebend. Zuko had been so excited as she summoned that tiny flame, and he summoned one too. He taught her how to move the flames slowly without letting them touch or burn her.

Ursa had been a little alarmed to now have two young children who could bend fire at will, but she knew their lessons would teach them how to behave.

Still, she had sat there oohing and aahing as the two put on countless shows where they summoned the flames and moved them. Slowly and carefully, she always warned them.

Only, Azula didn't stop there. Her power seemed to grow immensely, and her tutors were stunned to see how quickly she progressed through all the manoeuvres. Ozai had started to take a serious interest in her then too, blatantly disregarding his son in the process. He saw her strength and power, and made more and more time to attend her lessons and teach her things himself. He encouraged her violence and belief in her own superiority, despite Ursa's cautions.

Ursa had seen how sad it made Zuko, to think he wasn't as good as Azula. She had comforted him, and praised his efforts, telling him that working hard was more important than just 'being good'. She spent more and more time with him, to make up for the lost time with Ozai.

It was after her training sessions with Ozai that Azula seemed different. Crueler and angrier. She lit things on fire for fun, and laughed as people tried to put it out. Ursa and Zuko reprimanded her, but Ozai always seemed to be there to defend and even encourage her violent antics. Ursa pushed down the memories of many nights spent arguing with him about his treatment of their children. She begged him to spend time with Zuko, and help him improve. She asked him not to keep encouraging Azula's violence, but it was no use.

Ursa tried to remain patient with Azula, but the girl simply did not want to listen. It had resulted in mostly reprimanding on Ursa's part, while Azula found every opportunity to undermine and disrespect her mother.

Now though, as Ursa thought about what had become of her daughter, she regretted all those times she had yelled and chided before trying to comfort her.

Azula had needed her, and Ursa had abandoned her.

Noren placed a comforting hand on her arm, "What are you thinking about?"

She sighed and leaned into him, "I was such a terrible mother to her. She needed me, and I left her. I let him turn her into this...this..." monster. The word sounded through her and she shut it out immediately. No, Azula wasn't a monster; she had just done what she needed to do to survive. Ursa couldn't blame her for that. She just wished she could make it all right.

"Ursa, you were thrown into a strange and dangerous new life. Ozai was a horrible man, and I am so, so, sorry that you had to stay there. You were trying to survive too," Noren's face was kind, understanding, but it didn't make her feel much better.

"I just want to see her again. I want to apologize...but I don't think she wants to see me. I don't know if I'll ever get the chance."

Kiyi interrupted them, whispering, "Can we go now? I was going to play with Cho and Miki today."

Noren whispered back, "Soon little one, check with Zuko."

She did and the others happily stood to say their farewell's. When Zuko reached Ursa, he embraced her warmly. She was still so surprised to see how much he had grown, and she was so unbelievably proud of the incredible Fire Lord he had become. He was taller than her now, and it was still surreal having him back with her. 

He kissed her cheek and her hand cupped his face near his burn. She was still horrified every time she saw it, but he had grown to display it proudly, no longer afraid or controlled by his past.

"Don't worry mother, we'll get her back," he said gently.

"I hope you're right."

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