Hurt By The One I Loved

Saying Goodbye.

Lauren’s POV

I started sending text messages, giving a final goodbye, they wouldn't understand at first, but I think Emily and Alanna would, they could tell everything. Before I sent the texts, I took off the cap of my water bottle, and swallowed three pills, they would take about an hour to kick in.

I made a group message, with everyone from season 5 cast, except Alanna, Christian, Emily, and Steven. 'Hey guys, I just wanted to let you all know how much fun I've had with you guys the past few years filming, you guys have made an incredible mark on my life, and I love you all so much. ❤' I hit send, one message down, 4 to go.

The first individual message was for Alanna, 'Hey Bow Face, I just wanted to say how much I love you, and how much you've changed my life, its been incredible. I love you Bow Face, always remember that. None of this was because of you. ' I hit send, and I had to go fast, I started getting replies, one from Chandler, and I started crying, 'I'm gonna miss you Laur, Greg told my mom you quit, I love you Laur Bear. ❤'

I started on my second message, Emily's. 'Little Sis, I'm sorry for everything that's gonna happen. I love you, none of this is because of you, you were the closest person I had to family, since I never saw mine. I love you Emily. I love you so much. ❤' I started wailing, screaming. I hated Steven, I hated Christian. I hated myself, I hated life.

I started on my third message, Steven's. 'Steven, this was half of your fault. I never should've loved you, I was stupid. So stupid, and now it's fatal. Remember our conversation, "I was hurt by the one I loved." And now, I'm driven to suicide by the one I loved, I can't take it anymore. Goodbye Steven Yeun. ' I sent the message, and swallowed 2 more pills.

I finally started on my last message, the message to the Queen Of Backstabbers. Christian Fucking Serratos. 'You. You ruined everything. My job. My friendship with Steven. My life. You ruined my fucking life. You knew I loved him, and you didn't care. Just know, when you find out what happens, it all happened because of you. Goodbye Christian.' And with that, I sent my final message, I was crying, but it wasn't gonna stop me from saying goodbye to the fans. I posted a selfie from earlier with Alanna and Emily, 'I love you all. ❤' And I posted it.

I poured a handful of pills into my hand, there was about 20, and I swallowed all of them, and I could start to feel them kicking in, my eye lids were getting heavy, and my breaths were slowing down. I wanted to speed up my process, so I swallowed another 20, and another 20. I should be dead in a few minutes. And then I heard crying and screaming, it was coming from Emily, she was banging on my bedroom door. "Lauren please!" She said crying. I didn't say anything, I felt my eyes close, but I still heard her screaming.

∞

A/N OMG ONE MAYBE TWO CHAPTERS LEFT IN THIS BOOK. IM SORRY.