Thorny kind of Love

Chapter 16

Bell's POV

The sound of my phone's alarm wakes me and I focus on my surroundings, sending me immediately into a panic mode, I need to get to my room before anyone can see me leaving Ben's room. I try and free myself from Ben's arms without waking him, I finally get free and slowly start gathering my clothes, I enter the bathroom, grab the guest robe, and I slide it on and softly leave Ben's room. It's 07h00 and my shift starts at 08h00, I have enough time for a bath and to get some coffee before my shift. As I run the bath, I unfold my fresh uniform and place it on the bed, I get in the bath and slowly start to relax, the warm water soothing the sensitive area in between my legs. I lay back a bit and reminisce the evening with Ben, as I'm smiling thinking about him, I remember that Ben will be leaving in a few days, what will happen to me, will I be ok with a long-distance relationship, I can't bear the thought of him leaving.

I get out of the bath and start dressing, when I'm done, I call my brother and check up on my dad. Seems all is well with him and he asks if I would mind if he stayed over for another day, I agree and tell him to bring me some of the oranges growing on the tree by my brother. Just as I'm about to put my phone down, it rings again, it's Ben. "Where did you disappear to?" he asks with a husky and sad voice. My heart skips a beat as I imagine him waking up and not finding me there next to him. I can love this man over and over, I tell myself. "You do know that I work... I had to come and prepare myself." I say in a soft tone.

"What time does your shift end?" he asks and I reply, "I finish at three, why?" there's a few seconds of silence and then Ben says, "I'll wait for you after your shift, and then we're going out." I don't want to expose our relationship but I also don't want to argue with Ben now so I agree. I ask him what he will be doing for the rest of the day and he said that he will be in town with some friends, I tell him that I first have to home and change. "I love you Bell." He says as I'm about to end the call. "I love you too." I end the call.

Throughout the day, I waitress on a few guests and help Claudia clean some rooms, we hangout lunchtime together. "So there's this gorgeous guy in room 6, apparently he's Flynn's friend from Germany:" Claudia carries on and on, I know that she is talking about Ben and I try to act surprised and interested then she tells me something that set my mood into a wave of frustration. "So I thought he is single and then he comes out his room with two females, I assume they're also German because they were talking German, anyhow I watched them leave together in his car, typical player."

The way Claudia describes the females, I immediately know who she is talking about, and they're the same females that were flirting with Ben at Flynn and Chantal's engagement party. I feel a deep pain in my heart, and feel like I can't breathe, did I just make a fool of myself with Ben? I ask myself. Maybe they are the friends that he is meeting up with and I'm just jumping to conclusions, but what if he is only using me as fun and one of those females is his girlfriend. My mind is at war and I don't know how to feel or handle the situation. My shift ends and I am busy getting my bag as Ben texts me:

-I'm waiting in my car-

Still confused and frustrated I head for the parking lot and find Ben sitting in his car. He has a huge smile across his face and as I get in my seat, he leans over to kiss me, I turn away, and he looks surprised at my attitude. I find myself questioning his motives with me, I don't want to feel the way I'm feeling now, but I can't help it. I end up staring out of the window as he pulls out of the parking lot and then a sad old love song plays on the radio leaving me so much mixed and confused emotions and tears running down my cheek, I wipe it away hoping that Ben didn't notice.

"Bell what's wrong?" Ben asks as he places his hand on my leg. I don't know what to tell him, so I keep quiet and continue to stare out of the window. "Bell is it because I am leaving soon?" I hear Ben ask, he sounds broken. I turn to look at him and he tries to keep his eyes on the road, but glances at me. "Did I do something wrong?" I want to scream at him and at the same time I don't want to sound like a mad jealous person so I lie and say. "I'm tired, I think I just want to be alone tonight." I feel my body jerk as he brings the car to a sudden stop. "I want to know right now what happened or what I did wrong." He almost sounds angry.

"Ben can we just drive please, take me home now," I demand. Ben's hands look like its turning red as he grips the steering wheel, "Bell I am not driving until I know what is going on." He says assertively and continues, "We have plans for tonight Bell, you can't just cancel and I don't know why." I am too emotional to argue with Ben and I don't want to take the chance of saying something to him that I might regret later, so I say, "I just have a lot on my mind, but maybe going out will make me feel better." I lie. Ben looks a bit relieved and starts the car.

I run into the house and Ben follows me in, I am not in the mood to dress up and I don't even know where Ben is taking me, but I don't care for tonight good or bad, I will tell give him a piece of my mind. I settle for grey tights and a matching sweater and comb my hair into a ponytail and slip on my converse takkies, it's a bit cold tonight so I put on my denim jacket. I find Ben sitting relaxed on the couch with his hands locked behind his head, he looks deep in thought probably thinking of his girlfriends. I interrupt his thoughts and say, "I'm ready."

Ben's POV

I wake up and feel that Bell is nowhere near me, the bed suddenly feels cold and I feel her absence. I take my phone and see 3 missed calls from Polla and another from my mom, I decide to call Bell firstly, she answers and I ask, "Where did you disappear to?" She answers softly "You do know that I work... I had to come and prepare myself." I want to spend more time with her, I don't want to be away from her, I ask, "What time does your shift end?" She answers. I want to go somewhere away from here and chances that Gina and Miriam are in the same building and could see us, makes me nervous so I answer, "I'll wait for you after your shift, and then we're going out." We chat for a bit and the Bell asks what I will be doing for the rest of the day. I remember that I needed to show Gina and Miriam around a bit, so I tell Bell that I'll be in town with some friends, she reminds me that she has to home and change, I hate being secretive towards her and feeling a bit guilty I say, "I love you Bell." I feel relieved as she says. "I love you too."

I call my mom and we catch up a bit, I want to tell her about Bell, how I met this amazing person that I fell in love with, how she makes me feel. I decide against it, I know that I would rather tell her in person so that she can see my emotions while talking to her. I end up saying, "Mom, I don't love Polla and never have, I don't want to marry her." There is silence on the other end and then, "I knew this all along with my son." I didn't know whether I should feel relieved or disappointed by my mom's response. If she knew that I was unhappy with Polla, why didn't she say anything? I ask myself. As if my mom could read my thoughts she says," It wasn't my place to say anything, I decided to wait until you were ready to tell me."

After talking to my mom, I was happy that she understood me. I shower and dress and just as I'm about to put on shoes, I hear the high pitched voices of Gina and Miriam in front of my door, I open and want to ask them to give me a minute, but the guest next door opens her door and sneers at the sound of their voices, so I tell them to wait inside my room.

I showed Gina and Miriam as much as I could rushing to make it back on time to meet up with Bell, I go to my room and freshen up quickly and go and wait for Bell in my car. As she approaches, I notice that she doesn't have a smile on her face, maybe someone made her angry inside, I'll ask her about it later, I tell myself. She gets in and I lean over to kiss her, but to my surprise, she brushes me off. I let it go and start driving, I glance over at her and catch her wiping a tear away, and my heart feels broken. "Bell what's wrong?" I ask and place my hand on her leg. She doesn't answer and keeps staring out of the window, my mind raced with a million reasons with what could have gotten her this upset. I ask, "Bell is it because I am leaving soon?" She looks at me and I keep my eyes on the road but glance at her. "Did I do something wrong?" Bell looks like she could explode at any moment, but her tone leaves me feeling confused as she says. "I'm tired, I think I just want to be alone tonight." I bring the car to a stop and ask, "I want to know right now what happened or what I did wrong."

"Ben can we just drive please, take me home now," she demands. Right now I don't care if we are going to stand still whole night, but I don't want her to feel this way and I want to know what is wrong, if I was the cause then I want to solve the problem, I tell myself."Bell I am not driving until I know what is going on." I tell her and go on, "We have plans for tonight Bell, you can't just cancel and I don't know why." I feel a bit frustrated at Bell and her stubbornness, she looks at me weakly and says, "I just have a lot on my mind, but maybe going out will make me feel better." I can tell that she wasn't being honest but feel relieved that we still have a date, so I start the car and drive towards her house.

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Short and sweet guys....