𝐇𝐢𝐬 𝐀𝐭𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐧𝐞𝐲 | 𝐒.𝐌

Chapter 17

[Video: Elizabeth's and Lucifer's performance with Lucifer's friends]

I cried so hard while writing the scene between Lucifer and Elizabeth listening to this song: Sam Smith - Diamonds. I don't even know why..

I also listened to Maître GIMS - Jasmine. (I love this song omg!)

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Today I dropped Shawn off at the airport and I fucking french kissed him in front of everyone there. We both were blushing by the time we were done. While he was walking to the check-in, two girls asked for a picture with him and I've never felt jealousy like that. I wanted to kill them for talking to him. Something is really wrong with me.

I spend my sunday like every lazy person. I sit down on the couch, watching random shit and looking into some trial details I must finish before Shawn returns from Canada.

Maybe it's time to unpack my suitcase from my trip to the Bahamas. I didn't think I needed to do that already. I was convinced that the full suitcase would be behind my closet for the next three years, until my dad saw it and unpacked it.

The Bahamas was a fun vacation but it was for work, so it doesn't count as a real vacation. I was there with my boss, Bakker and a lot of other colleagues. That was back when Bakker was still normal and with Ella, instead of in love with me. Damn, this past month has been a rollercoaster.

-

One of the silent brothers hands me the hats he bought for our performance when I'm trying to get my hair in a proper braid. The suit I'm wearing is way too big, but it doesn't matter, I don't want those seventeen-year-old hormon balls lurking at my body.

'Are you ready?' I ask Lucifer while we walk to the pathetic stage.

'Liz, I was born ready.' He smiles.

We all stand on stage and everyone snaps their fucking fingers in the right way when the music starts. I'm relieved they all follow the steps properly and focus on my own dancing.

I look at the audience and something is missing, someone is missing... I suddenly start to panic. Everyone is looking and smiling at me, and I get anxious. What is happening to me? This never happened before.

The last couple of seconds of the dance are a blur when the song finishes. Everyone claps and howls when we leave the stage. I look at the audience one last time, looking for my mum, but I can't find her.

I start hyperventilating when I arrive at the bathroom. I throw my hat onto the ground. Lucifer follows me and Ludovic starts touching my arm to check if I'm all right, but as most people know by now, I don't like people touching me, unless they're family or Shawn. I yank my arm away from his touch and grab the sink to keep myself standing.

'Leave!' Lucifer screams to Ludovic and the silent brothers.

The bathroom is empty and Lucifer takes my face in his hands, making me look at him. We both stand there in the same outfit in the middle of the bathroom. I'm panicking and I just can't keep it under control. I never have a panic attack!

'Once upon a time there was a woman named Mina, she was the best person you ever met... Say it with me.' Tears fill his eyes.

'She always holds you when you cry, she always hugs you when you arrive, and she always has the biggest smile when she looks into your eyes.' We say in usion. 

I take a deep breath and also start to cry. 

'Her touch, her warmth and her love, will always stay with you, even when she is not there to hold you.' I hug Lucifer and cry on his shoulder.