Cypher {Suga X Reader}

Real Feelings

I'm lost, in the eyes of a man yearning for love.

Jimin's confession. The second confession. It was all getting a bit too overwhelming, and I couldn't understand it.

I grin, "This is a joke right? You're joking with me right?". My mind tries to make sense of everything by denial.

Jimin hated me a while ago..
Jimin is an idol...
I disrupted their circle of comfort..
How?

Jimin frowns and shakes his head, a bit sad at my sudden disregarding of his feelings,

but what more can I do? Or say?

"Jimin... I-" and I'm interrupted by his voice.

"y/n... I know I told you how much I hated you before, but that was- that was because you were something new, something I wasn't used to... but now I am used to you, and I'm happy around you, and sometimes I even feel like I'm going crazy, and... I think it's because I like you" his rambling reminded me of someone,

Yoongi.

Wait what?
Why is Yoongi in your head when your bias is literally pouring out what's in his heart to you?

"What do you want me to say?" I stammer.

"I want you to be mine" He says; the nervous man I witnessed only minutes ago is being possessed by confidence.

"Jimin, I don't know my answer to that. I haven't processed it yet, and I haven't thought of you as anything more.." I mumble, unable to look him in the face.

Jimin begins walking towards me and his eyes are screaming desire,

"But y/n.." he whispers as his body stands only centimeters away from mine and his hands in my hair, caressing each strand, and on my body, his face leaning into mine, staring entranced into my eyes. I'm too nervous to move.

"Jimin" I finally force out his name.

Jimin suddenly halts, his eyes blinking. He backs away from me and mutters "sorry" while covering the lower half of his face with his left hand and his eyes are ripped away from mine and are now on the floor.

"You don't have to say anything for now, but please give me an answer eventually", he plead, "I'm a bit impatient.."

I nod at him and try to put on a smile, but it's hard as my mind is reckless. I begin to walk out of the studio; Jimin doesn't follow me.

This isn't like it was with Namjoon.....

The stairs echo my footsteps and they're piercingly loud but my mind is louder and I don't know what to do and now there's two men who need an answer and I'm exhausted and I'm still sweating. And now it's silent.

Yoongi
I miss him...

I walk into the flat and the hallway is empty, but in the kitchen is the seemingly listless Yoongi and he's staring into space.

"Yoongi..." I attempt once again.

"Oh, y/n.. did you eat yet?" and I actually get a full answer.

"Not yet, I was just in the studio-", I begin but I cut myself short,

I want to talk to him, he would- should know what to do..
But I can't..

"Oh nice... ", his face frames into a slight frown, "I- uh- have to get back to work..".

Yoongi's eyes avoid me, and I don't understand it, but I can't bring myself to ask.

Please! Don't go! I just want someone to tell me what to do! I want your company!

But the words in my head never make it to my mouth, and Yoongi disappears into his room before I can even try and force them out.

I drag myself to my room and try to ignore my screaming head, that's now not only questioning everything but also overthinking everything. I have to catch myself before my ego gets too big.

This isn't anything worth freaking out this much over!
Why don't you feel happy! What is wrong with you? If anyone else was in this position, they wouldn't be like this!

I sat in my room, reminiscing on the past week,

I have to make a decision, for both Namjoon's and Jimin's sake.

And I need to sort out my real feelings.
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writer's note:
hey guys, I hate adding writer comments since they disrupt the flow of the story, but thank you all for reading so far! 

as an amateur writer, I'd love some feedback!