Breathless

Chapter 1: Forsaken - March 23 - 24

She woke up again. Opened her eyes to a new day. To gentle sunlight streaming through her window. But the joy of it didn't flood her heart.

Today was an anniversary. An anniversary she would never wish to celebrate. It was the two-year marker of a death. The death of her life's dream. The dissolution of her marriage to that beautiful boy. The one who had captured her heart in second grade and never let it go. Even now. Even as he turned to another girl for the comfort he used to find in her. Still, he held her heart. Over two years later.

How to overcome this deep pain?

It was what she awoke to every morning. It seemed to ride those rays straight into her heart.

But, no, that wasn't true. For that pain didn't enter her heart from some external source. That ache was spiraling up out of her core. A constant reminder that she had been forsaken. Rejected. Abandoned for another woman.

What was wrong with her? That he would leave her.

—

She opened her door and noticed a blur of crimson lying several yards beyond her feet. As she stepped down off her porch, she bent her gaze upon that ruby patch and discovered a resplendent red rose. A single bloom. Resting on the concrete beneath her.

Frowning, she looked around. But there was no one. She glanced at that beautiful bloom again. It was so forlorn. Lying discarded upon the cold, hard ground. Its beauty forsaken. She knew exactly how it felt. Someone had plucked it in its glory. Only to abandon it a short time later.

She bent to retrieve it. She rescued that forsaken flower and buried its stem in refreshing water a few moments later. Over several minutes, she watched as it drank from that cooling water and was enlivened by it. The rose lifted its precious head as life reinvigorated its form. Even her own spirit perked up at the lovely picture that blossom provided through its visible restoration.

Would some cooling drink of water slip into her life someday? Someone to refresh what her former love had whisked away?

—

The next morning dawned bright and clear, its air cooled by the dew of daybreak. Though she fought hard against the encroaching light, she lost her fierce battle. That light was persistent. Piercing even to the dividing asunder of her eyelids. It practically forced them open. Though she resisted it. Struggling to stay hidden within her dream world. That beautiful garden...

How it beckoned her!

The memory of that glorious garden was the only sustenance upon which she could feast. That beautiful dream world reached for her during her waking hours too. It called her back to the realm of slumber. Promising her comfort. Joy. Peace. Love. All the things her heart craved. Its gentle embrace longed to engulf her with its serenity.

But alas! Every morning she still awoke. Driven from that oasis by the fearsome rays of that bright star that hung above her in the earth's glowing dome.

She stretched her arms over her head as she squeezed her eyes shut. Still withstanding the vibrant allure of that blazing sun. Its cheerful presence sought to convince her that life still held wonder. And beautiful worlds to explore.

She didn't believe it anymore. That sun had lied to her. It had cast its cheerful rays down upon her during the golden days of her old love affair. It had promised that his pledge was true. That his heart was steadfast. That his devotion was eternal. But all too soon the bitter winter wind had slipped across her skin. Burning it with his deceit. Then those brittle beams had proven just how fragile they truly were.

She groaned. She had absolutely no desire to climb from this bed today. But work was beckoning. However, she didn't want to answer that call. She heaved a deep sigh. She wondered if her heart would ever come alive again.

Yet as she entered her kitchen a few moments later, her eyes were drawn towards that crimson rose. She had nestled it in a crystal vase and set it up in the windowsill overlooking her sink. The rays of that rebellious sun were striking rainbows off the surface of that cut-glass receptacle. Their shine was burning her eye. Still, she felt that ruby beauty tugging on the door of her heart. Its petals were unfurling in the warmth of that bright star. The rose seemed to urge her to open herself to the possibility that life still held joys for her to discover.

Like the wonder found in the velvet petals of a scarlet rose.