> 𝐏𝐑𝐄𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄. • 𝗁𝖾 𝗑𝗂𝗇𝗅𝗈𝗇𝗀

𝐅𝐈𝐅𝐓𝐄𝐄𝐍

— 𝐗𝐈𝐍𝐋𝐎𝐍𝐆'𝐒 𝐏.𝐎.𝐕.

the departure was awful. we cried, i hugged her tightly and wouldn't let go for over five minutes, we said our finally goodbyes... and then she disappeared onto the plane. well, not disappeared, but she left.

although it was hard and there were many tears shed... over the course of the past two weeks... the pain of letting her just leave had left. gosh, i honestly wish i could have begged her to stay longer... but i can't. she had family who needs her right now. even though i think i can't possibly live without her... they can't either... and that's why she needs to go back.

i can already tell it's only going to get harder and harder though. now that she has left, our schedules have been busier. that means more practicing, more performances, more songs, more covers... and less time to call her.

i have tried to call her even if it's just an audio call every day now, but... some days i'm too busy, and our time difference sometimes conflicts with when we can't to call. i might have a break when it's in the middle of the night where she lives... this just sucks.

sadly, though... she told me information a few days ago that hurt even me, yet had not much to do with me... a few days ago her father passed away. her family had been expecting the news... but i can't imagine the pain they must of felt hearing it.

considering this... i've given her some space. i told her that if she wanted to ever call i'd try to ask for breaks and i'd try to be awake when she needed me, but i also told her i'd try to not be the one to call, since i don't want to push things... which (y/n) had said she appreciated.

i'm just a little nervous for what's to come. she said she isn't doing to well and she already is starting to miss me... which i can't lie about, i already miss her more than anything. i miss her hugs, i miss hearing  her beautiful laugh in person, i miss her small hands, and surprisingly... i miss the stupid fights we both had with one another. i just miss everything about her, and just her in general.

i miss her.

— 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐏.𝐎.𝐕.

two months. now it has been two months since i left to come back home. lately... we haven't been talking as much either. he's been as busy as he can possibly be, i've started my new homeschooling program along with dance, and overall... we both just have stress flooding in during this time.

but, after getting settled in with schoolwork and everything, my happiness has definitely improved. i meen, i'm still keeping in contact with mingrui, so if i need a joke-of-the-day he's already got an entire list prepared.

but back to xinlong... i miss him more than anything right now as i sit at my desk, trying to do my math work under my lamp light. i really have to stop holding my work off until after dinner..

as i continue to sit there, i just sigh, then grabbing my phone, and clicking on video call, seconds later pressing on xinlong's name. as it rings and rings, i begin to loose hope he'll respond... but right as i'm about to hang up, he answers.

"i'm sorry, my phone was plugged in, and-"
"it's alright." i say, giving him a soft smile before placing my phone on my desk, facing me.
"are you doing homework?"
"schoolwork... but yeah."
"schoolwork? this late?"
"i've held it off all day, so i'm just finishing up." he inform him. "anyways, what are you up to?"

"well... nothing today, i don't think. i'm pretty sure we have off."
"that's nice. then... does that mean we can talk to each other for longer?"
"mhm." he says, a soft smile appearing on his lips as he then falls onto his bed on his back. "anything that's on your mind that you wanna talk about?" i shake my head at this, and he lets out a small laugh.

"come on, there must be something. stressed? bored? overly happy?"
"well... now that i'm talking to you i'm happy." i tell him.
"that's good."
"what about you? do you want to talk about anything?"

to this, he presses his lips together and shakes his head.
"you sure?" i then question again. "you always ask if i'm doing alright but i never get to know if you're doing alright. so, are you?"
"i'm doing just fine." he tells me, giving me a lip smile. "but... i do miss you... a lot."

"xinlong, i told you not to say that." i sigh.
"i know! i just... it's hard not to tell you when i do... i miss you so much. it's been two whole months and i just- i don't know how i've even lasted this long."
"i... don't know how i have either." i then admit, slouching in my chair before putting away my school work.

"did you finish?"
"nope."
"then why'd you stop."
"i wanna talk to you instead." i tell him, plopping down on my bed with a sleepy groan.

"what time is it there?"
"only a little after nine, but... i'm still tired."
"long day?"
"mhm."
"well, why don't you go to sleep then."
"but i wanna talk to you-"
"(y/n), i'll always be here when you wake up as well. i'm doing nothing today, remember? and... if you really are having that hard of a time falling asleep you can call me again."

"but... i don't wanna do that."
"well... then what about this? why don't i sing you a song to help you fall asleep?"
"i- sure.." i then answering, already knowing he won't take no for an answer in this scenario.

so, that's what he does. i place my phone by my head and close my eyes, listening to the sound of his voice sing a soft sounding song, which slowly makes me drift off into sleep before hearing one last thing come from the phone.

"sweet dreams..."

—✖️—