|| ship; kshaw
|| warnings; mentions of abortion, trans!harry, trans pregnancy
|| words; 0.8k
- {} -
After nearly a month of back and forth conversations, bad habits and hiding away, Harry had decided he wanted to keep the baby.
JJ was right there with him, ready to support his boyfriend's decision.
It all came down to the fact that as much as Harry hated the idea of keeping the baby, he hated the idea of terminating it more.
And so, a long six months was ahead of them.
JJ did his best to keep Harry feeling as happy, and comfortable as he could.
Which meant pretty much putting his whole life on hold.
Harry stopped doing any form of work halfway through the third month. He could't bring himself to, even though he needed something to keep his mind occupied. Meaning JJ was caught between needing to be home with his boyfriend, to keep an eye on him, and needing to work to pay the bills. Put food on the table.
The way he chose to do it, was essentially just to work while Harry was sleeping. He'd managed to get hold of some work from their friends, mostly just doing editing. But it meant that he could do it whenever, instead of at set intervals, which was helpful.
And their friends insisted on paying him generously, since he wouldn't let them help any other way.
Harry hadn't been outside in months.
Just because he was scared.
Scared of being outed, or misgendered. Or just being looked at weird. Because he'd get that a lot.
To be fair to them though, it's not every day that people would see a pregnant man.
JJ understands the fear Harry has though. It makes sense really. He's seen first had how deeply being misgendered, even accidentally, affects his boyfriend.
Harry blames himself when it happens. Thinks it's his fault. Because he doesn't look masculine enough. Is acting too feminine. Thinks that it's something he's done, because there's no other reason someone might slip up.
Pretends he doesn't care, but JJ knows he does.
Him hiding away just proves it.
The night Harry went into labour, was the first night he'd left the house for nearly six months.
JJ was glad, in a sense, to finally see him out of ye house. But also, was more worried about Harry's distress and pain to really think about much else.
It was a long night.
Nearly eight hours of pain for Harry, and JJ felt utterly useless.
He couldn't take the pain away. The most he could do was make sure the doctors used the right pronouns, and hold Harry's hand. Reassure him. Make sure he knew someone was there with him through it.
It hurt his soul, hearing Harry in so much pain.
But by the time it was over, both of them were thankful.
-
"Come on baby, you're doing so well," JJ tells Harry, who just lets out another groan of pain in response.
"I can't JJ, I can't do it," Harry pants, not even opening his eyes again. Doesn't have the energy to.
"You're nearly there Mr Lewis, just keep pushing," a midwife encourages. JJ grips his lover's hand even tighter.
"You've got this Haz, push for us," JJ says, nearly drowned out by the cry of anguish Harry lets out as another wave of contractions ensues. Feels as if his hand is about to be crushed, but doesn't care.
Watches as Harry puts in all the effort he can, and then goes limp. Breathing heavily.
And their baby is there.
In the midwife's arms, as the cord is cut.
JJ is almost lost for words. Almost.
"You did it Harry, you did it," JJ whispers, pressing kisses to Harry's sweaty forehead. "It's over now."
"I want to see her," Harry says, quietly, barely able to open his eyes from how exhausted he is.
The midwife hears, and after wrapping the baby into a blanket, passes her to JJ.
He can't stop staring, at the tiny bundle in his arms. Not making much noise really, just laying peacefully in the blanket.
She feels so fragile in JJ's arms, so much though that's he's scared he might hurt her.
His daughter.
Harry looks over sleepily, reaching out a hand to touch their baby. JJ can sense that Harry needs to be closer to her, so passes her carefully into his arms.
Watches as Harry gazes at her, the same way JJ had done a minute ago.
A small whimper escapes him, and JJ watches a tear roll down his cheek.
"I did it. She's here," Harry whispers, seemingly just to himself. JJ reaches out to lay a hand on top of Harry's.
"You did so well. Get some rest darling, you look exhausted," JJ mumbles, pressing his lips to his boyfriend's forehead once again.
"Love you, JJ."
"I love you too Harry."
- {} -
a.n: hey guys
i know this was really short, so apologies (and probably not the best, i haven't edited it yet)
i just wanted to get at least something out
there will be one more chapter to concluded this mini oneshot series, and then, i'll be moving onto requests
to everyone who's put in a request, i'm so sorry it's taken so long. i'm so much more busy at college than i thought i might be, with problems inside and outside of school
it's just a bit hectic at the moment
anyway, hope you're all well, and see you for the next chapter
~ Oscar
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oneshots • sidemen
Fanfiction{INFREQUENT POSTING} oneshot book for the sidemen and friends. - disclaimer: these people i'm writing about are real! i'm not in any way trying to suggest that this is actually what's happening between them, i know all of the sidemen are straight, a...
