J: Hello, Dom.
Dom: Hey Jay.
J: Let's just get on with the interview. Can you tell me what you know about what we're dubbing the Jerry Incident?
Dom: I know Taurtis was stabbed on Halloween and got into a bus crash with Grian? Uh- that's about it? I think?
J: What about Jerry?
Dom: Oh, right. Sam convinced Taurtis his name's actually Jerry? Somehow? That's- that's all I know. For sure.
J: Alright, thank you-
Dom: Oh! And Sam's making Grian pretend to be Taurtis. Because he's insane.
J: Because he's- wheeze Alright, thank you.
Dom: No problem.
~**~
J: Sam, hello.
Sam: Hi.
J: So, tell me about what we're dubbing the Jerry Incident.
Sam: Incident?
J: I- nevermind. Just tell me about Jerry.
Sam: He's the new guy, duh. He wears a hospital gown all the time and sells JerryKats. He's also my roommate, along with Taurtis, of course.
J: .... oh.
Sam: What?
J: Nothing, nothing. Is that it?
Sam: About Jerry, yeah.
J: Alright, now what about Taurtis?
Sam: Oh, you know, he's the same as always, put on a bit of weight, though. laughs And he doesn't like Toritos as much as usual. Weird, huh?
J: Uh, yeah, yes, weird. And Grian?
Sam: Who?
J: .... that's all, thank you for your time.
~**~
J: Hi, you must be, uh, Jerry.
Taurtis: Yep!
J: Do you know who I am?
Taurtis: Can't say I do.
J: I'm Jay-
Taurtis: Like the letter?
J: Sure.
Taurtis: Cool!
J: Very. So, do you remember anything before Tuesday, November first?
Taurtis: I....
silence for about thirteen seconds
Taurtis: Should I?
J: Well.... considering you suffered pretty bad head trauma in the crash-
Taurtis: Crash?!
J: Uh, don't- don't panic, obviously you don't remember it, so- uh, so you don't remember anything? Anything at all?
Taurtis: No?
J: Okay, that's.... what about Grian?
Taurtis: .... who?
J: Gr- sighs Taurtis.
Taurtis: Oh! He's friendly enough, I guess. Sam says he's acting odd lately. I wouldn't know, I don't know him.
J: exasperatedly sighs You're right, you wouldn't know. Because you aren't him at all.
Taurtis: Uh, no?
silence from both
J: That's all I had to ask you, thank you for your answers.
~**~
J: Hey Grian, how's it going?
Grian: Bad.
J: As expected. sighs Right, interview. You're the only person in this school capable of straight answers, so please, please give me them.
Grian: chuckles Ask away.
J: So what really happened on Halloween?
Grian: Oh. Uh. Sam.... Sam convinced us to go into the school, but as it turns out the school is haunted.
J: Haunted?
Grian: Yeah. Remember Gareth?
J: Yeah.
Grian: His ghost is haunting the school, and he has some ghost buddies to keep him company. He chased us with a noose- uh, he and his friends they uh- yeah, they chased us.
J: Oh, that sounds horrifying.
Grian: laughs Yeah, I guess. I think we were hiding from them and Sam stabs Taurtis out of nowhere and he- I-
silence for about seventeen seconds
Grian: I'm sorry.
J: No, no, don't be.
Grian: O-okay.
J: You good with going on?
Grian: Yeah, yes, uh. I got Taurtis onto a bus, but he insisted on driving? And then there was the crash, and now he was unconscious and I had to get him to the hospital a-and they treated Taurtis but not me and-
J: Deep- deep breaths, Gri.
heavy breathing
Grian: Okay. Okay.
J: Maybe we should end it here-
Grian: Nononono I can still talk-
J: We'll just continue this tomorrow-
Grian: loudly I don't want to go home yet.
silence for about eleven seconds
J: .... then continue.
Grian: O-oh. I thought- oh. Um, Sam convinced the hospital that I was the one who stabbed Taurtis, and then, well, uh, now he's forcing me to be Taurtis. When it turned out Taurtis had lost his memory, Sam convinced him that his name is Jerry, and that I'm him- well, Taurtis, you know-
J: You okay?
silence for about six seconds
Grian: .... can we end it now?
J: Of course.
